Friday, April 30, 2010

Morning Coffee, Meditation

I had a good one....

There was a problem with my "Moral hazard of being white and entitled" post. Seems like I fixed it.

Ugh.... I'm trying to get... some Blog Mojo going.

There are so, many things.... I can't explain.....

Well... without serious time in the saddle.... I'm not sure I can... get much going on this 'Blog' front.

Seriously... I tried... Flashing Cursor Fever!

Thursday, April 29, 2010


I did 20 minutes on the rollers, it was more the mind that couldn't make it happen. I broke down and started fueling heavily, yesterday. I have no idea what I have eaten. All good healthy food..

but there is this loaf of Blue Cheese Garlic whole Grain Bread, that is almost gone. Nice chunks of garlic, I've had better blue cheese.

Point is, I'm spent, and trying to refuel... this weather is screwing it too.... In fact... I want to suggest that this weather can SUCK IT!

I have a ton of energy.... and I'm starting to climb the walls... and yet.... it feels like I need to rest more....

One more day of "30 days of cycling"...

Where was I!

You want some crazy talk?

I'm not sure I posted this, already. It's worth a repost.

The best things in life, Can't be understood.
The second Best things, Can be thought about, but not explained.
Last, there are the things we talk about.

This is in that list..... Somewhere.

I like to track.... Global MEME's, I like to know and monitor, what "They" are thinking about. I find it interesting. It's similar to what Carl Jung talked about "Global Unconscious". I'm not a believer, I'm not a ..... No Mysticism.... NO Magic!!!

I admit, there are things that science hasn't figured out yet, but to conceder and accept something, based on no evidence, is fraught with confirmation bias... etc... The Greeks covered it well, lack of evidence to the contrary, is not evidence of something's existence.

But Moods Affect, each other.... Right... That is part of "The Mop Game".... I intend to infect you with my, Enthusiasm.... Infect you with my Positive Mojo! And I hope that you can spread it on, to the people around you.

Like I say, "I have your back, Let's GO!!!"

On monday, I was talking to one of my economics friends, about it. "Everyone is VERY MANIC. The world is on Fire right now. The question is, 'Do they have the endurance, to keep it going, Now that they; "have it up, Can they Keep it up".

I know I can, But the real question is.... Can "They".... They never have before....

Getting in the Flow


A few Demons this morning, Horrible... Nagging Demons!

I'm obsessed with Economics right now.... It's what is on my brain....

and I need to get some work done.

Here are some of the links i'm getting on the Macro front:

Wednesday, April 28, 2010

Bring Back Blogging... Updates

Sandy has a nice post about....

I'm not really sure, I think he went out and got drunk and hit by a car... But it's better if you read it, I think.

Greg Steele has been posting

As, Ryan and Sandy and I get caught up... in Bringing back blogging, I wanted to point out some of the other people who are "Trying to bring back the blog thing"... and try and encorage them to keep going, and for my readers to do the same.

Blogging, actually has some ... Literary ... merit. Done correctly, it might even make us, better writers.... maybe even better human beings.

So, good on you... and if you notice anyone else, doing regular posts, Don't hesitate to mention it.

Moral Hazard, of being white and Entitled

These were comments I made today, on some Macro Socio economics stuff, I figured I'd share.

The charming one is;
The States rights, civil war Redux, Meme going around.Those who don’t understand history, are doomed to repeat it.
Definition of insanity; doing the same thing over and over again, and expecting a different result.

They lost the civil war, Tried to refight it in the late 1800’s and in the 1950’s-1960’s…

But NOW….
THIS TIME THEY ARE GOING TO WIN! this time the “mongrel hordes” are going to be defeated by the righteous.

As opposed to, it all turning out they way it has, every other time. Since in reality, we are all mongrels… and they need to get over it. Maybe realize “Being White” isn’t going to get you a damn thing. You may just have to “work for it”.

Sounds good to me, People “Putting in the work”, sounds fiscally healthy, in the long run.

Unless of course, you are the chronically lazy….

I’ve seen you in the office, I’ve seen your internet and computer usage….. It’s time for you to Buckle down, It’s time to start Producing,

Either that or

It’s time for someone who wants to work, to have your job.

I’d say Rick Santelli would call it, the Moral Hazard, of being white and Entitled.

3 for one day!!!


The word is "We are going to do the ''Greek thing'"...

Understand, I look at the market like it is a video game.

When I say, we are going to do "a Greek crisis dance", it means that we will have a crisis on sovereign risk, and we will get to "maximum negative sentiment" ie... "the world is going to end" and that will be a point to "Buy something" in the market.

Just like every other time, I'm not going to give market signals.... but I wanted to "Get the word out" since I've had quite a few people, who want to talk Macro-economics with me.

Truth is, it doesn't matter what I think, what matters is what "They think"... and this is going to "Go Down" over the next "Time Period"(I don't know if it's weeks or months)


I was talking to a friend of mine, they remarked on how angry I used to get. I suspect I don't get angry, as much. I also remember a bit of a vitamin B deficiency, for a while.

But when they said it... I remember my Girlfriend at 23, and I was fixing something on my Mustang, and I got so angry.... I umn.... I actually tore the dashboard out, with my bare hands(there were some screws and bolts).

It was a thing, I was 22... I was angry... Angry because, fixing my car was going to take a second day, a second day I didn't have. There were other issues, non personal issues.

It reminds me of... This.... Of my aggressive stance on life right now, Like I said "I'll kick and piss and spit" "I'm going to break", or "Shit is going to be Broken"....

I wonder what the odds are?

I felt like, a few days ago, that the metaphorical clouds were starting to open, it is, and was amazing. I have no idea what they are opening to, but... It seems like good stuff...

So, unfortunately... though Kicking and being angry, are not particularly Healthy or Positive emotions, and certainly not particularly useful, against anything but your own Demons.

Sometimes.... You have to Breath.... and then you have to Fight!!!... Well, you have to "wake up" at least....

Trying, not Winning, is Freeing!


Turbo, busted me....

we are working on "More Blogging" and I'm trying to do less.

I was verging on "Dribble" or" Blogger Drool"... There is a point, where you are more "noise" than "Signal". To use a statistics term.

Burke is off on the Gila!!! I hope he got the Good Mojo This morning...
I want to see him focused, and in the flow... I'd like to see him that way, for the rest of the year... Personally, I think he can take over the cycling world.

Days of our Lives....
Don't doubt, that anyone... that I'm affectionate with, and I can include Everyone in this, without your homophobia going off. Anyone I'm affectionate with, is exceptional. Realize that, if you can't appreciate the way "The Mop" Celebrates all of you, for Being you.

Celebrating you, for trying to be All that you can be!.... If you can't appreciate that, you and I are on the Wrong Path and 'Never the Twain shall meet'.

Well, she came, yesterday.... Chips were down, and she dug into her bag... she dug in, and needed my mojo...

She, was waiting for me to "yell!" or tell her off. She was on D-Fence... I don't know why people put their guard up, with me. The problem is, I get in deep.... I can be like a Tick, I get right into the skin and soft parts.... and you just have to trust that i'm not a blood sucker.
Hopefully this does not imply "Trust me".... Never trust someone that says "Trust me".

Still, It's hard for me to explain... I'm not a negative influence, I don't care how Horrible you are, That is your place I guess, That is your path.

Yes, she had some Bile, Yes, she threw out some nasty shit. ... But I don't..... I'm not Fickle with my affection.
Of course, I'm not sure that she is the...... Love of my life, or something, one of my Motto's now is "we will see". I don't think she is "Outdoorsey" or Adventurous enough for me.... I'm not sure her Blood flows, or heart pumps hard enough.... and ... Once you establish some patterns with people... the patterns are hard to break.

One Love, Everyone!!!! One Love!!

Tuesday, April 27, 2010

Second Cup of Coffee

I'm trying to post less, than my over-posting, this weekend.

More deliberate in my actions....

Turn the volume down.

I read through a few of the past posts, and realized how sloppy they were. Of course I want to convince myself that these posts are the anomaly, and not my normal dribble.

The morning has started slow. I'm trying to get in the flow.( Poet, know it)

But I need to remember it takes 2 cups for me to get going.

More work... Less Bullshit!.. that is all...

This is rolling through my head:

"You, the one who waited....
You have waited long enough!"


Stop waiting, and GO!

Monday, April 26, 2010


We have started the "Irregardless" meme, on Sandy. Try and use it, as much as possible when speaking to him, until it drives everyone Crazy.

We can see if it will catch on. For some reason it reminded me of one of the old jokes we had going. I can't even remember it, but Sandy and I had it going about Ryan....

Oh!! it was when we spent weeks talking about the "Secret Plan" we had, that he was unaware of. Or Sandy and J-rad did...and I was just an accessory.

It's more likely, that this will just fizzle out.

Of course, one of these days, I'm going to get it, the bad end of that... and I'll be hyper sensitive, and freak out, or something..... all fun and games.....somebody in the eye.

First Big Till!!!


It's hard to tell the difference here, but you can. I did till a month ago, to keep the weeds down.
but that is the first till. The goal is to break up the soil as deep as possible. I will have to go back and hit some trouble spots, places where the soil is still in rough shape. I've even done a second pass. It doesn't actually take that long.... with a tractor. With my tiller, that would have taken all day.

The next pass will be a "Break up the soil" I'll go through it at about half the depth, and make the tiller move super fast, and it will make the soil, nice and fluffy.

Post 400 in 3 days

FYI.... Sandy, has been blogging and trying to blog, sort of every day...

Let me tell you, what helps a blogger..... Readers.

He may be a little hit and miss(by hit and miss, I just mean in regular posting), but if ... People give him some support by reading.... he may post more.

Double edged sword... If he would post more... maybe he would get more readers... Which came first... Chicken... Egg...

Well, we could get some wicked crazy doctor stories:

"Sir... I'll pull the nail out of your Scrotum, in a moment.... But I need to take a quick picture, so I can put it on my Blog!"

Or at least he could, Fake a post or 2. Collude with some of the Nurses, when it is slow... "What kind of blog post, can we fake tonight!"

Of course... maybe there is an Anti-Blogging policy.

Personal stuff

Look at Lone peak,
look at it out there.... Calling.
I don't think I could pull it off in one day.
Ok, I could, but i'm not sure it would be the best idea.
I need to lube up the Hiking boots.
This is lunch. You have no idea how nice, a sandwich, and a little coffee, and notice...
full glass of water, just water, is on a spring day, out in the garden.
Again, A garden can be a wellspring for your soul.
The salad, is cucumber, onion, tomato, Feta.

Sunday, April 25, 2010

Days of our lives

I need to clear a bit of it out of my head.

"Days of our lives woman" Emailed.

Now seriously, a week ago I was thinking, and was just.. blown away, as I became aware of some of the things she said to me. Nasty things. I was, and am, over it.

Here I sit, Weeks later... months later... I'm having little flashbacks...

Mostly, she is being nasty because, somehow she perceives me as "Ill-Will-ed" somehow.

Every one of you knows me. There may be an Angry bone, There may be a Frustrated Bone, There may be a Sad bone.

but there is not a "Go fuck yourself",
There is not at "you fucker",
There is not a "I'm going to Take you down!"
there isn't a "I'm going to slash your tires",

My penalty is "I will no longer try and bring Joy, Happiness, and encouragement, to your life."... But that is what you want right? I never understand... But I respect your right to be miserable. Sometimes, that is the process... sometimes being awful is just ... "You"

(shit.... that is kind of Co-dependent, isn't it.)

I see these people, all the time... and I say something to them...and they can't even believe that someone is saying good things to them. They assume the negative in all people.

This is "Her", this is "Days of our lives".... Upon reading the email.... I again, felt the dark, Felt the cold, Felt the black, Felt the horror.

Super hero me, superhero MaXX.... Wants to jump in....... "ONCE MORE INTO THE BREECH!!!" Super hero me, wants to break through to her..... it's so dark in there....

and I sit here.... and if she is going to try......maybe I can try....

It Costs... NOTHING, to be good, A smile costs NOTHING!


I allow some of you, to open the box, a little bit more, Some of you .... Get the choice....

In my Clark Kent Life... (I hate Clark BTW, and I'm not Bruce Wayne. I'm more a Peter Parker, or Bruce Banner.all of that and being an anti-Hero....) In this life....

It is very much is Pandora's box, You do not want to open it..... I swear, Keep the box closed... it's a much better game.

I was again, thinking about it a few days ago.

I worked 60-70 hours, last week... I work at 3 am, I work weekends.... My life is hard!... I'm in a constant battle to forget about it. ... and that is the thing... You want to know! "What is Clark Kent Like"... It's hard, every day.... Half the time, I'm trying to get Me going, not you... I'm trying to make, My Blood Flow... Not yours.

I'm a real person, I'm super smart..... I read people well... I communicate poorly.... I make mistakes.....

awwwww..... Crazyness!!!!

So.... More Teen Angst, Sorry. -Get Over It.(and get over it, and get over it!)

It's your world, Your box to open, Your choice to make, your life to lead....
Make those choices, Live that life, Open the box, Close the box....
It's all yours to do with, as you choose.

Improvise Adapt Overcome

This is the Marine Corps, motto.

This is a Hoe, a hoe is your friend. it can pull any weed out of your garden, without bending over.
They need to be sharpened, and you know all those metal files you have. Well this is the reason you have them. I know the picture is blurry. But Place the file at a 45 degree angle, and sharpen until the hoe is Like a dull Knife. Especially the corners.

The tires on the tiller came loose, so they are tubeless. In order to fill a tubeless Tiller tire, I wrap a rope around it, and cinch it up tight, then you can get it filled. This was problem number 1 with the tiller today.(ya, I could glue it.)

This was problem number two, This tine on the tiller broke loose, I suspect it has been like this for a season or two, I thought something had been wrong with it. This will need some welding. But no time today. These are, all things that go wrong in the garden. and the secret is to Improvise, Adapt, Overcome. The tiller problem could have, burned my entire day.

The pattern is simple, largest to smallest.
  • I start with the biggest tiller, the tractor,
  • then move to the larger one, this yellow one,
  • then I have a smaller tiller,
  • then I move to the hoe.
  • Hopefully, I don't have to do anything by hand, or bend over.
There is a ton of land here too

In Between the chamomile and the chives, I quickly Tilled. Leaving some clusters of weeds and "Keeper Plants"

Here are the remaining plants after working them over with a quick Hoe.
Chamomile chamomile chamomile...
Here I am, Preparing the other bed, next to the greenhouse, so that I can put the chamomile in. This is a digging fork, Most soil is compacted at a depth of 3-6 inches, if you drive a digging fork into the compaction layer you can break it up, and the roots of your plants can get deeper into the soil.
Also, the compaction layer is about 3 inches thick ( 3-12 inches down is a 3inch Shell like layer, in the soil, that you should at least Crack), so it can give space for the roots and water to get through. This is the perfect tool. (no picture of the result, but this is where I moved all the chamomile)
These are the chives, After moving them from the garden to the flower bed, on the side of the Greenhouse. I've transplanted chives for, 5 years now... they just grow and grow.

Today's major project.

In this Mire of spring weeds, is Chamomile, and chives. These must be moved to flower beds aroud the greenhouse.

These are some plants in the greenhouse.

This is the Greenhouse... it is a filled with shit.

This is today's project... this an a thousand other little things. Nothing out here is ready, yet.

Base Camp

I'm going to do a series on Gardening. I may actually move these post to a new blog. So, somebody snatch up.... Mop's secret Garden. I'd assume you have never read Secret Garden, and if you have, you probably didn't understand a word of it, and beyond that, you certainly didn't get the theme.

Taking care of, Maintaining a garden, both literally as part of Mental Wellbeing, as a mediation. Or Figuratively, as the Meditation, takes care of your overall wellness, as a human being.

Garden----->Meditation(thought, reflection, mindfulness, Prayer, Oneness with the Eternal)------>Wellness.

And it's healthy and interesting and it is fun.

This section of my garden was first. Ok, I'm lying. I built part of my garden, to try and figure out what i was doing. Then In year 2, I realized:

I NEED A BASE CAMP! In your garden, you are going to spend MANY HOURS, When you are tired or hungry or thirsty, or hot, or confused, or angry, or sad, or bitter, or Flusterd, or .....

You can pull the troops from the field, and you have base camp. No going into the house, to get distracted with TV, No Muddy boots in the kitchen, No..... BASE CAMP! Set up and be ready to live here until your next meal.

There are 2 trees on both sides, east and West, The largest on the West side, to kill the afternoon sun. The Grass is a Drought Tolerant Triple Dwarf Fescue, This is also where my irrigation runs.

This morning, I had fruit coffee and water. I also had a place to put a jacket or heavy shirt, as needed. It is important to just dig in, and work and stay outside, be focused....

Other than that, This is just a killer place to sit, I even take my coffee out here, in the morning.

It is here, that will be the Wellspring of your actions.... and FYI.. That was a damaged, Starbucks Bistro table, I picked up cheep.

Saturday, April 24, 2010

No matter where you go, There you are!

Where the hell was I...

Tired, Long day! Tomorrow, is garden day, I hope!

Good day on the bike....

Oh! So, for all my bullshit... I LOVE GETTING UP IN THE MORNING! I'm sure this is going to change.

I have been getting up, and seriously saying; "What a Great day!! I wonder what kind of adventure awaits me!!!!" and I go out, and have a hoot! I don't know what a hoot is, but I seem to be having one. Just fun, all damn day... and all evening.

I was talking to Julie, she was like "There are the Awake, The Asleep, And The Dead!"... have to love Julie. .

This brings to mind, my thought today, that I'm probably going to mouth off to the wrong person in the next few weeks, and the next think I'll know, I'll wake up in the ER.... and remember why I try not to go outside!

Some guy decided to pass today, I said "FUCK THAT! " out loud, and hopped on his wheel. He had power to weight on a climb, he held a bad Line... one of those guys with the TT kit. Weird... he totally talked to himself, as he rode....

I mean, my demons may chase me, out on the bike... But I don't talk to them.... Damn!!! I think I'm crazy.... shit!!! I knew, he would probably lose me on the climb, before we hit it, I talked to him.

"Hey, Thanks for the Pull."


"I figure on the upcoming climb, I won't see you again, and wanted to say thanks".

"Oh! always good to see a Pal, out on the bike"

(in my head, I'm like, ok...I guess we are buds now)

ok.. he only beat me by 100 yards. and I could have gotten him on the flat, but I was going up the canyon, and he was not.

Just for reference, he wasn't eating, nor was he drinking... OOPS!!! just goes to show, how little things like that, can give you a significant edge.

Friday, April 23, 2010

Dear Diary

for the purpose of the .... Bring back Blogging....

this is how I'm going to *Punt* "dear diary"

I think, I may not be in a very good mood!

I feel rested up for a friday...

Hey... I'm trying..... making all the mistakes I can... Just Keep kicking!!!

Weekend of gardening and Cycling... and some work.....


Tomorrow ..... Another day!

Thursday, April 22, 2010

I want to sing a rock ballad today.

Shrug.... I don't know, Just telling you how I feel. I'm usually much more stressed by the end of the week. It's been a good week. Don't worry, the worm will turn at one point....

I burn too hard and too fast.... for things to stay gentile for long.

"Steady as she goes"... Is not my mantra.

I'm more, Kick it in the teeth; until it's dead or it eats you.

It's a post. I'm meditating on a few things.... but Who knows... I may sit and see what happens if I stare at a flashing cursor, tonight, and see what happens.

Wednesday, April 21, 2010

Suit up and Play!

Rest day today, 2 naps. I would love to... keep napping...I'm trying to recover. If I sleep all day, I'll have a tough time tomorrow. Much work to do...

My new facebook friend Nancy Alcabes, was talking about the Old mop... Like he was dead. I like, to see him as, severely wounded... Maybe like Launcelot du Lac (I'm not sure this is the best, example.)

It has been a long couple years since then.

Over that 2 years, "The Mop" is a Wounded Warrior. By that I mean that, my life is very different now than it was then. Much Harder, Much less 'Flow'. These days, I tend to fall apart more. My life has Huge Stress.... That is the change, in "The Mop". I wish it wasn't so, but that is the way it is. I'd like to change it, and am working on it... But Reality is there, and you can't fight "What is"... or "The Izz"

All I know is this, Every day I have to Kick!... Kick and Spit and Piss. Fight every day, Fight every hour. Every hour of every day until I die.

You can't give up, you can't surrender... you have to fight.

Life is Pain, Life is Loss, life is destruction, Life is Fighting Entropy.

When all those people say "Breath".... YES! that is the first step.....
Make Life Happen, Let Life happen...


Fight 'what is', and try and build 'what could be!'

You may not get what you want, or what you dream about... but you may get something better than what is....


The Stadium is out there!!!!!

Tuesday, April 20, 2010

Fat Tuesday..

I can't believe, what I have eaten....

My legs were toast today, they needed... 48 hours of Lay down...

Unfortunately... sitting on the couch or laying in bed, just ain't my bag.

and I'm not so sure about the Brain, that has been pushing them either. It's been Burning the candle at both ends for weeks. This stupid #30DaysOfOverTraining has not helped either.

So.... Time to eat... I had dinner twice... and I snuck out for some cookies and stuff.. graham crackers... Mmmmm Best not get addicted...

and I totally want to vomit....
I'm like the prom Queen, the weeks before the dance, Only Scruffier... and generally very angry.

I'm doing the First Endurance, Burke sent me... I feel a difference, but it's not like they shook the over-training away. There is a difference, Given more time, we will see how effective I think they are. So, far so good.

But Honestly, the Brownie I just ate...
I think is going to do wonders for my legs... BUT... I think I still need to stay off of them.

How about some fun!

Blog in Crisis

I was talking to my father the other day.

I said "I appreciate talking to you, But honestly I don't need to hear about every Meal, and Every fart you have"(ok, it was similar to these words) "If we talk, can't we talk about something interesting, All it does, is spoil the interesting conversations we have."

Then of course 3 hours later, I'm like.

"Damn... you know, 'the mop blog' is just you, talking like your dad... about every bowel movement and Breath you take."

..... Obviously we know it's true.... I'm going to try and be better... Still like a knife in my side...

But when you blog every day.... there has to be something. Maybe being better, will involve being quiet more......

Then the fun posts, will be better.

Stick to what I know.....

Which is little.

Facebook is wild, I didn't realize. One can while away a ton of time there. I am very sorry, I have yet to explore it fully. My time is so limited. It probably wouldn't be if I didn't twitter and blog so much..... Choices Choices Choices.

Spring cleaning time.... Which I'm mix in with all the other million things I'm doing. Then there is the garden, but everything is 90% clean... and then we can get to the Garden. Which is Amazing right now. What free time I have, I want to go out there and hang out, Go Barefoot with the dirt between my toes. Drink Coffee, and meditate on life. Great Stuff....

I cracked the windows here in the office, and in my room... Brrrrrrrr... and it's that Brilliant.... Chilly brrrrrr while I sleep, the kind that makes you cuddle up in bed. But it's a wonderful contrast with the, now warm days.

I have some new "Mop Games" I want to play. My time is Seriously screwed, right now, so I have yet to feel like I can add, this new layer of Bullshit to my life....

But ... We are getting to it.

Monday, April 19, 2010

I have to blog again

Somehow, this has become a pain in the ass...

There must be tons of things going on, in the old mop's life.

The next Big project is the Tilling, I'm very behind on the garden, But TOMATOES WILL ROLL!!!

Spring Cleaning is almost done, All the sets of winter Cycling Kit, are Clean and dry. I may run them through the dryer again. Be warned.... this usually means I have to sweat in them One more time!!

I'm sorry, this post kind of sucks......

The garden is starting to roll!!

y'all haven't seen it in a long time...

Spreading Compost....

Time to get the Tilling done!!!

SO..... The Mop now is on facebook I'm not psyched to, have yet another way to socially network, but I do like the ability to upload photo's, and there are more pictures of the garden on the page.

Sunday, April 18, 2010

Long day

... I have 20 minutes left in this day, so I'm trying to blog...

Its hard to, match that last post!

.... Pause Pause Pause

Hey.... I blogged...

As "Bad Santa" says..... They all can't be winners now can they.

Saturday, April 17, 2010

I am definitely, a Mad man in a Box.

Fist episode of Doctor Who just ended. Good stuff! Not any where near as bad as I expected!

I was going to message Burke this afternoon. I said this to Greg Steele, "I feel like I'm in a bike race, and everyone keeps crashing behind me because I'm not holding my line."
Probably better to say this to everyone.

The Return of The Mop! I think we are all in for it!

What are we about to get ourselves into?

Because I am definitely.... A Mad Man in a Box!

The Doctor and his Tardis, next stop......

I had to post this again!

Shit is going to get broke!

pretend to blog

Can't ... get an adventure going tonight.... I tried.

Fuck it!

see if I can go to bed early this evening!

Friday, April 16, 2010

Hi blog!.... Skin of our Teeth

"Hi blog, How are you?"

blog, "I'm good, You?"

"Like you give a shit?"

"Where were we...?"

"It's friday... Decompressing."

"Whole world on our shoulders!....."

"Yep, wouldn't have it any other way."

"Get's to you by friday, though."

"Tough stuff."

"You decided to do this. Bring back 'The Mop', Turn your life up to 9 on the volume control."

"Yep, Fuck it, Skin of my Teeth! See how hard we can play, lets break something!"

"Still, The voices get you on friday."

"Don't be dramatic, AssWipe!, it's not like schizophrenia, they are just your/my(FUCKER!) inner voices."

"Doesn't stop you from freaking out, now and again, now does it?"

"No, but .... Huh!... What were you saying?"

"That wasn't as funny as you thought."

"I don't know, it had it's moment"

"Fuck you!"

"it has been an epic week....Again"

"Lets hear more about Fridays"

"What that everything on tv makes me want to puke!. Everything in the music archive, makes me want to kill..... And if a commercial came on, I would throw a shoe, or coffee cup. But the upside is ... I can't sleep either. If I lay down it's just the voices in my head."

"Oh, that has to be pleasant"

"They are My voices, what am I going to do?"


"Now that isn't as funny as you think."

"All work and no play make Jack a Dull Boy!" "Yes, this is very funny!"

"eh!..... Ok, A little funny!"

... quiet day

it's friday....

so... I'm going to punt here on a post.

I'm still recovering. I wanted to do 12 miles or so... and I wasn't feeling it.. I went 7... still repairing. still healing.

Thursday, April 15, 2010

MillCreek Or bust

Made MillCreek, didn't get dropped, by Man or Skirt...

I heard a great Bowie song, while I was out..... Like you care.

It's about 7 Miles to the bottom of the valley, another 7 up to the mouth of Millcreek. I tend to stay on very Residential Roads. So I end up going up 45th south...
Which is brutal BTW... I crest it and i'm on Wasatch... at 90%... with drenched Glasses, usually encrusted with salt.

it's not clear past the parking lot... Which is good, gives me a reason to go back.

Honestly... I'm cooked...

I was thinking, the T-Bird should start a band... then he could tour with it Too. Either that or he could find people who can play and be part of the band, at the events..... Just a thought... I mean... he is doing everything... he could add this Right?

I may have to reach out to my contacts and find out if you can give Funeral Potatoes, to people who just had a baby. #ironyItsfunny

Oh! sidenote… former mormon friend made this thing that was chocolate Cake, fudge Frosting…

and somehow you Drenched the whole thing in caramel.

Then the paramedics showed up with the Insulin… and you ate another piece

It was a mormon Variation, she called it the Fudge Orgasm surprise, the mormons had a different name, but her addition was the Drenched in caramel.

In fact... I think this is it, I think

If someone asks what your favorite cake is.... ya... shut up... this is it!!

Risotto Done!

Sausage Pea...... There is a reason ..... I rode MillCreek!

ya, it was the big grin.... But.... Look at that thing!

Wednesday, April 14, 2010

beautiful day

I wanted to just do a quick ride today... I doubled it, then doubled it again.

It was nice...

that is all I have.

Good day on my end. I want to do Millcreek tomorrow... it's one hell of a ride just to get there, from west jordan.

I was thinking today that I should just keep it simple, and just put out more, regardless of consequences...

I'm not psyched about it... I was just thinking about it. I also seem to be voting against it. I was also thinking about Calling another woman, and going out this weekend, but you know how that works, I'll do that, and "The 'Days of our Lives' woman" will call up, want to know what I'm doing.

Sure enough.. I get a phone call tonight, and it's a woman I know.

Get this...

her, "do you want to go to my son's Soccer game on saturday"

me, "So that I can seen, with you, by your ex-husband."(I mean, we know i'm a super hero.) Also her Ex is a DickHead.

her, "oh..."

Me, (got her on that one)" But did you want to do something else."

Her, "Ya, lets go for a hike... but I don't want to go to the mountains, so lets go check out the parkway, But not Saturday... Sunday."

Me, " Alright! " 20 minutes later... I realize, we are taking a romantic Sunday walk, on the jordan river parkway, no less. Second.... This sounds like we are "Having a Talk".

Isn't this how woman work, you start out, there is a nice thing going, Next thing you know you are fighting about...

The best one is from, the jennifer aniston-vince Vaughn movie

"Why would I wan't to do the dishes"
"I want you to' Want' to do the dishes."

Ok... seriously.... I want to do the dishes...

Tuesday, April 13, 2010

Today Needs an Ass kicking!!

Sorry to my, more sensitive Readers. I am trying to "Be Better" about swearing. For the most part there are better ways.

I was looking through the Kubler-Ross Model on loss.

  1. Denial
  2. Anger
  3. Bargaining
  4. Depression
  5. Acceptance

For the most part, One jumps around. But I've always been a huge fan of this model. There are also Micro trends.

I seem to be Angry today.... But in the past weeks, I also seem to remember doing some bargaining.

I also want to point out that... After being depressed about something, One tends to get angry... Sort of angry about being depressed, or angry at one's self... but once you have that kind of energy... usually the depression is over.

And you move into acceptance... I felt I moved into acceptance on "Days of our lives" days ago.

It feels like it... But I guess kicking back to some anger.... bla bla bla

The horror show would be if, I'm just getting to anger.

But.... I just think this day needs an Ass-Kicking!

Hell with that dumb chick.... I'm a great guy... she is effing stupid... Good LORD!!

Not only am I a Great guy... I'm an amazing person, and personality.

To Quote Billy Joel... "I may be a lunatic, but i may just be the lunatic, Y'all are looking for!"

Pissed off!!!

I'm Pissed off for someone, I'm not going to mention names, I'd imagine it would be ok.

There is a reason there were Unions, If you hire someone, they should have to commit for a year, or you get paid for a year... Unless there is some kind of Gross Douchbaggery!!!

One of these days, he is going to find a job that lets him be him......

I'm not sure what that is..... but.....


That is it... I'm with the TeaBaggers.... Fuck this shit!!!! (no idea what this means(ok, it's an epic Ironic Joke))

Monday, April 12, 2010


I love a good rain, Wash the sins of the world away. It's raining here. It never rains here, and when it does..... I always say "It's like the Earth, is Sweating", it's never enough to wash it all clean, so it just mixes with the dust, and everything is sort of covered with Grease.

There was a documentary on about "Utah work", about some of the jobs people are doing, about the recession. They did a piece about the people who stand in front of the Tax places and turn the sign. There was something about, finding dignity in any work... I'd agree take pride in your work.
They then had a part about "Following your bliss", then they made a modifier "Follow your Blisters". Here is the thing, whatever you work at, you have to be willing to suffer, so if it's something you are willing to suffer for, something you enjoy.... I think that is the thing to do. When you do it, you should fill fulfilled.

Ignorance is bliss, Contentment, Satisfaction...

I umn.... was looking today.... I'm finally Athletic... I still have weight to drop, but... I'll never be 150, or 160.... People would beat me up... Do you have any idea, what an asshole I am?

Days of our lives?

I know I said I wouldn't .... about it. It feels over for some reason. I only fall in love about every 5 years, its seems. A friend said to me, "Mop(Right, my friends call me mop ;p ), you are right where you are supposed to be", Ugh.... Karmicly... which I don't believe in, I've lived a life that would deserve Sainthood, or be the Greatest Man in Utah.... Ya, I believe in Chaos... It makes way more sense.

Whatever the sense is..... In all this...

“This guy’s walking down the street when he falls in a hole. The walls are so steep he can’t get out.

“A doctor passes by and the guy shouts up, ‘Hey you. Can you help me out?’ The doctor writes a prescription, throws it down in the hole and moves on.

“Then a priest comes along and the guy shouts up, ‘Father, I’m down in this hole can you help me out?’ The priest writes out a prayer, throws it down in the hole and moves on

“Then a friend walks by, ‘Hey, Joe, it’s me can you help me out?’ And the friend jumps in the hole. Our guy says, ‘Are you stupid? Now we’re both down here.’

The friend says, ‘Yeah, but I’ve been down here before and I know the way out.’”

Keep Fighting, The adventure continues.....

Oh... Sandros... decided to try and do some Blogging... I'm very excited

Sunday, April 11, 2010

Meditation on Salvation

2 Wheeled Salvation
(Respect to the Blog of the 2 Wheeled Salvation.)
Love Salvation.
Family Salvation
Adventure Salvation.
Religious Salvation.
Blog Salvation.
Twitter Salvation.
Money Salvation.

sal·va·tion (sl-vshn)
a. Preservation or deliverance from destruction, difficulty, or evil.
b. A source, means, or cause of such preservation or deliverance.
2. Christianity
a. Deliverance from the power or penalty of sin; redemption.
b. The agent or means that brings about such deliverance.

From Wiki

In religion, salvation is the concept that God or other Higher Power, as part of Divine Providence, saves humanity from spiritual death or Eternal Damnation by providing for them an eternal life (cf. afterlife). The world's religions agree that humanity needs salvation from its present condition. However, they hold irreconcilable positions on what it means from an eternal perspective to become saved, the actual way to get saved, and the resources needed to attain salvation.[1]

But... are these just the tools we use, real salvation is internal...
... These are the ways we express it.
... or these are the tools we use, in our salvation.

maybe Salvation in all things....
(I'm not psyched about this post... it doesn't feel very clear)

I'm out of stuff to blog...

There is a great post about Piper Virginia Barrett out there. What a Cutie!! Heart Breaker already.

The garden has started... Ready or not...

Yesterday was amazing, full shorts.... great day for a ride, today was overcast, but ok temp wise.

Blew my first tube, I may switch to 12oz CO2 They are cheep, and you only get one charge anyways. They happen in 3's right.... So if I tried to refill a flat tube from my bag?
is that number 2?

Well, Keep fighting Mop... Allons-y

Saturday, April 10, 2010

Riding update

I had a full day of trying to get started on the garden, it was good to start. I seem to have about 3 jobs, right now. I only stop, long enough to Joke, or to ride the bike.

It was so nice, and I'm doing 30 days of riding or 30 days of cycling, I moved out for a few miles. Originally I thought I'd just do a couple miles, but since it was a day for shorts, I felt like there were a few miles in my legs, I even turned off and put in a few more, just because it was so nice.

Well... sure I felt good... I had a tail wind...

It was still nice on the way back... But a surprise how hard it was.

I talked to Ryan, about diet. I'm working 3 jobs... etc... and trying to get riding in. This is why i've been off the bike for the past 2 years. It's been too stressful to add the biking, But I'm convinced that I'm going to do it, or have a nervous breakdown... or blow up or something...

it's going to work, or something is going to give out.... We will see what it is... Even I have 50/50 it will be my head.... LOL

I with all the stress, i've been going out on no fuel. I eat yogurt and fruit for breakfast, and start drinking a pot of coffee. By the time I can get out for a ride, I just go... and I'm spent... and feel drained.... but I still love it. My diet concern was that I would consume the hard won muscle in my legs. On friday I went out and did 3.5 hours, and had nothing but a water bottle. I bonked at 5 or 10 miles and just suffered.

What ryan said, is that some guys swear by it, By training with no fuel, and droping weight, pushing metabolism.... etc...

Well, Let me say that it's true....
My metabolisum is so high, that I eat anything, and my energy level goes through the Roof! I've been fighting for 2 days to keep things on an even Keel. If I eat 1000 calories at a meal, I just Blow through the roof.
The rides are Rough... It's not all that bad, since the endorphins kick in on the ride, but you are still "Tanked". But Keeping from .... knocking down walls after Meals is .... Rough.

So... I think if you ask me about this kind of training.... "Riding On no Fuel"... I would not recommend it, it's not much fun, and it's hard to adjust to. It's tough on the head.

But it seems to do, just what it should, throws the MBR into overdrive, and helps to drop weight like mad.....

but... keep your hands and feet, inside the ride at all times!!!

Allons-y.... Keep Fighting...


I just read the past few post.... WOWW!!!!! THEY SUCK!!!

I'll try and do better in the future.

Sandy got me going, yesterday. I can be a bit of a hypochondriac, especially when it comes to my brain. I worry, I over analyse.... The whole bit.

I'm constantly obsessing about my mental health, how can you be "The Mop" and not ask a ton of "hard questions" about who you are and what you are doing. I don't doubt I'm a bit of a Nut.

He was worried I had gone manic. I'd pay money for a good manic. Not that I'm on the other side, It's just having a ton of energy to do a ton of crap would be great. I spend 2 hours working out, and 2 hours trying to recover. I spend 3 hours trying to wake up. The rest of my time, I spend working. I've gotten up at 4am-6am for 3 years... It's my usual time... most of you get up from 6-8... I'm just 2 hours ahead... and I normally go to bed at about 9 or 10... sometimes I Take an afternoon nap.

That is my life.... and I'm trying to "Have a life!"

Fighter pilots have a saying, about living on the "Edge of the envelope". For the past 4 months, i've been trying to not hold back.
I'm trying to see how close I can get to the edge....
I push it a bit from time to time...
I can feel myself start to fall...
and I pull back.

I've known that it was going to be difficult...
Nothing worth having is easy...
if it was easy... you would already have it.

But that edge is right there.... I can spit and see it fall.

Hopefully I don't fall off..... but maybe that is the big car wreck this blog has been looking for....

I'm willing to find out.... Lets hope for the best... and see how it works out

Friday, April 09, 2010

Game over!!

Well not me.... I know I've said it a few times... I had to dig deep... I talked to a friend of mine, she made me understand it.

Regardless of what people say or do.... If they really want to be together.... If Tiger Woods Really loved his wife. He wouldn't have cheated.

If she wanted, if she really wanted to be with me....

She would have done the same thing I was willing to do.... We would have both "Tried" to moveheaven and earth to be together.

And it's that Easy!!!

Let us hope this is the end of all these episodes of "Days of our lives"