More rambling

I have one remaining episode of "The Prisoner" to go. I'm going to be psyched to have it over. It's not very good. I'm just finishing it to prove I have the stamina to do so.

I do intend to write as I watch. What shall I write about. I swore I had something. I'm going to drink a cup of tea..... I should drink more tea. I rode for nearly 4 hours. Zero food. My riding is getting worse. Last fall, in horrible shape. I was moving nearly twice as fast. Even last week I was faster.

I'm guessing my current results, relative to past weeks are mostly because I'm getting fatigued and could use some rest. No rest for the wicked. I do feel stronger.....

The only easy day was yesterday......

What I don't like..... I'm riding on negative emotions. Lots of hate and anger and self loathing. I'd say I'm riding on the dark side, what I don't like about saying that is that we have negative emotions, its best to not pretend that they are there. They don't clear unless we let them out. Just because I can ride and am riding on negative emotions, doesn't mean they are taking over. It just means that they are there. What I don't want is for them to the the "source" of my riding. Otherwise we create the negative energy to keep the hate going to make it all happen. That is what I don't want..... at least that is my thesis.

I've also taken it easy, told myself to give myself a break. Just try and ride with some joy. I'm hoping that builds.


More tea.... How delicious, fruity tea.