Tuesday, May 07, 2013

Hard days

I could just use feeling good for 10 hours. I've managed a couple hours. As much as I loath my physical condition.... It's improving. I need to not de-rail it. I also need to forgive myself for eating some bad crap... Meaning Wings and beer. Then eating... a plate full of turkey and cheese and some bread and pepperoni... .Why do I feel guilty about that. Besides the bread I should feel good.....

I just want to be a superhero and I want it now.

I want to not feel fat, I want to not be angry, . I want my shirts to not feel like tents(though maybe optimistically they are getting looser). I want to not hate myself..... I want to not hate everyone else.

I want to wake up refreshed and satiated. I want to feel like a new dawn has started and more progress can be made..... I want to be clear of thought and intention..... I want to be loved and respected.....

I want to put in hard days and feel like they are paying off.......

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