I'm actually not sure this is true, I'd just like to think it is. I'm not an alcoholic, I think it's just been a rough winter. My birthday was Sunday, it was as good a birthday as I've had. I remember a birthday that was very nice, 15 years ago. Then suddenly my Ex thought I had gone to the strip club the weekend before, because I made a joke about it. The result was 3 hours of fighting. P.S. My ex... and most of my GF's have always been more attractive than most Strippers i've ever seen.
Ok, when I sat down here my intent was to talk about my love of Julie Holmes. Many years ago, Julie and I were just sort of flirting, usual sort of stuff. I exchanged some e-mail with her. She then asked me later if I had told anyone some of the stuff that we had written in that e-mail. I told her no. Many of the secrets that people tell me.... and trust me, I have a few. I think it's the blog, and its so raw and honest, people have a tendency to want to reciprocate, it's natural. Also something maybe about me, somehow they open up to me. I've never ever wanted anyone who told me something honest or in confidence to feel like that would ever be violated. So... I would never tell a person, anything that anyone has shared.
I find out that one of her "Stalkers" and julie has a few. She tends to have them moving in and out like a revolving door, around her. Well, she told me about it. you know, I have a super hero esque persona... I call myself an Anti-super hero, which is a super hero who is forced into his roll by circumstance. There is a movie called "Hero" with Dustin Hoffman. He is a classic anti-hero. Julie tells me something, which throws a Huge Red Flag at me about what is happening. Up to this point I had never called any one of the readers of this blog. Well I hopped right on the phone and called her.
she said, "Why?"
I told her "Julie, this is a safety issue. The blog is stupid. You need to be safe. You haven't told anyone about this, and I need to make sure you are safe."
using my mop powers, and ... well, shit like this doesn't live in the light of day. Once I told the person that I knew. They backed off. Crazy doesn't like to have people know that they are crazy.
But.... so began Julie and my Love affair. Everybody likes a good rescue...... Except for me.... Ever since... it's been a quarterly phone call, just to catch up on each others dysfunctional relationships, each of us hoping that the other will find real love. She has asked me a few times, Why don't we date? I just reply.... You scare the shit out of me... or some such nonsense. But... on my birthday, When the day before she gave me a solid HTFU, or Nut Up! I needed that solid swift kick in the ass. I then told her how great she was.... she then yelled at me... said "Why don't you fucking call me" Sure enough, there was julie on the phone on my birthday. The two of us gabbing like a couple of girls. Neither of us able to get a word in.
Her saying stuff like "you know you dork... Your posts are getting darker and darker... you know that!" I said, "Ya, that is because this thing has finally become nasty. The current Ex finally has made me dislike her. Which i'm sure is what her defenses were trying to make happen. Trying to make me into the bad guy."
on that side note.... ya.... she wins.... Now get out of my life... She wins a ticket home. I hope that is what she wanted?
Well, I always talk about "the mop's super friends"... and how they come up for me "large"... Super man has the kryptonite around his neck... and they show up and pull off said kryptonite.... to let me fight on another day. It's just one of those times where .... I just have to say that I love Julie Holmes. and some of my other superfriends who stepped and have stepped up for me "Large"
P.S. I still don't think we are going to date.
If asked why... I'd just reply... "I just don't get the feeling it is what the universe wants us to do"
Of course... I could be the George Costanza of dating....