Improvise Adapt Overcome

This is the Marine Corps, motto.


This is a Hoe, a hoe is your friend. it can pull any weed out of your garden, without bending over.
They need to be sharpened, and you know all those metal files you have. Well this is the reason you have them. I know the picture is blurry. But Place the file at a 45 degree angle, and sharpen until the hoe is Like a dull Knife. Especially the corners.

The tires on the tiller came loose, so they are tubeless. In order to fill a tubeless Tiller tire, I wrap a rope around it, and cinch it up tight, then you can get it filled. This was problem number 1 with the tiller today.(ya, I could glue it.)

This was problem number two, This tine on the tiller broke loose, I suspect it has been like this for a season or two, I thought something had been wrong with it. This will need some welding. But no time today. These are, all things that go wrong in the garden. and the secret is to Improvise, Adapt, Overcome. The tiller problem could have, burned my entire day.

The pattern is simple, largest to smallest.

• I start with the biggest tiller, the tractor,
• then move to the larger one, this yellow one,
• then I have a smaller tiller,
• then I move to the hoe.
• Hopefully, I don't have to do anything by hand, or bend over.

There is a ton of land here too

In Between the chamomile and the chives, I quickly Tilled. Leaving some clusters of weeds and "Keeper Plants"

Here are the remaining plants after working them over with a quick Hoe.

Chamomile chamomile chamomile...
Here I am, Preparing the other bed, next to the greenhouse, so that I can put the chamomile in. This is a digging fork, Most soil is compacted at a depth of 3-6 inches, if you drive a digging fork into the compaction layer you can break it up, and the roots of your plants can get deeper into the soil.
Also, the compaction layer is about 3 inches thick ( 3-12 inches down is a 3inch Shell like layer, in the soil, that you should at least Crack), so it can give space for the roots and water to get through. This is the perfect tool. (no picture of the result, but this is where I moved all the chamomile)
These are the chives, After moving them from the garden to the flower bed, on the side of the Greenhouse. I've transplanted chives for, 5 years now... they just grow and grow.

Today's major project.

In this Mire of spring weeds, is Chamomile, and chives. These must be moved to flower beds aroud the greenhouse.

These are some plants in the greenhouse.

This is the Greenhouse... it is a filled with shit.

This is today's project... this an a thousand other little things. Nothing out here is ready, yet.

Base Camp

I'm going to do a series on Gardening. I may actually move these post to a new blog. So, somebody snatch up.... Mop's secret Garden. I'd assume you have never read Secret Garden, and if you have, you probably didn't understand a word of it, and beyond that, you certainly didn't get the theme.

Taking care of, Maintaining a garden, both literally as part of Mental Wellbeing, as a mediation. Or Figuratively, as the Meditation, takes care of your overall wellness, as a human being.

Garden----->Meditation(thought, reflection, mindfulness, Prayer, Oneness with the Eternal)------>Wellness.

And it's healthy and interesting and it is fun.

This section of my garden was first. Ok, I'm lying. I built part of my garden, to try and figure out what i was doing. Then In year 2, I realized:

I NEED A BASE CAMP! In your garden, you are going to spend MANY HOURS, When you are tired or hungry or thirsty, or hot, or confused, or angry, or sad, or bitter, or Flusterd, or .....

You can pull the troops from the field, and you have base camp. No going into the house, to get distracted with TV, No Muddy boots in the kitchen, No..... BASE CAMP! Set up and be ready to live here until your next meal.

There are 2 trees on both sides, east and West, The largest on the West side, to kill the afternoon sun. The Grass is a Drought Tolerant Triple Dwarf Fescue, This is also where my irrigation runs.

This morning, I had fruit coffee and water. I also had a place to put a jacket or heavy shirt, as needed. It is important to just dig in, and work and stay outside, be focused....

Other than that, This is just a killer place to sit, I even take my coffee out here, in the morning.

It is here, that will be the Wellspring of your actions.... and FYI.. That was a damaged, Starbucks Bistro table, I picked up cheep.

No matter where you go, There you are!

Where the hell was I...

Tired, Long day! Tomorrow, is garden day, I hope!

Good day on the bike....

Oh! So, for all my bullshit... I LOVE GETTING UP IN THE MORNING! I'm sure this is going to change.

I have been getting up, and seriously saying; "What a Great day!! I wonder what kind of adventure awaits me!!!!" and I go out, and have a hoot! I don't know what a hoot is, but I seem to be having one. Just fun, all damn day... and all evening.

I was talking to Julie, she was like "There are the Awake, The Asleep, And The Dead!"... have to love Julie. .

This brings to mind, my thought today, that I'm probably going to mouth off to the wrong person in the next few weeks, and the next think I'll know, I'll wake up in the ER.... and remember why I try not to go outside!

Some guy decided to pass today, I said "FUCK THAT! " out loud, and hopped on his wheel. He had power to weight on a climb, he held a bad Line... one of those guys with the TT kit. Weird... he totally talked to himself, as he rode....

I mean, my demons may chase me, out on the bike... But I don't talk to them.... Damn!!! I think I'm crazy.... shit!!! I knew, he would probably lose me on the climb, before we hit it, I talked to him.

"Hey, Thanks for the Pull."

"what!!"

"I figure on the upcoming climb, I won't see you again, and wanted to say thanks".

"Oh! always good to see a Pal, out on the bike"

(in my head, I'm like, ok...I guess we are buds now)

ok.. he only beat me by 100 yards. and I could have gotten him on the flat, but I was going up the canyon, and he was not.

Just for reference, he wasn't eating, nor was he drinking... OOPS!!! just goes to show, how little things like that, can give you a significant edge.

Dear Diary

for the purpose of the .... Bring back Blogging....

this is how I'm going to *Punt* "dear diary"

I think, I may not be in a very good mood!

I feel rested up for a friday...

Hey... I'm trying..... making all the mistakes I can... Just Keep kicking!!!

Weekend of gardening and Cycling... and some work.....

Allons-y

Tomorrow ..... Another day!

I want to sing a rock ballad today.

Shrug.... I don't know, Just telling you how I feel. I'm usually much more stressed by the end of the week. It's been a good week. Don't worry, the worm will turn at one point....

I burn too hard and too fast.... for things to stay gentile for long.

"Steady as she goes"... Is not my mantra.

I'm more, Kick it in the teeth; until it's dead or it eats you.

It's a post. I'm meditating on a few things.... but Who knows... I may sit and see what happens if I stare at a flashing cursor, tonight, and see what happens.

Suit up and Play!

Rest day today, 2 naps. I would love to... keep napping...I'm trying to recover. If I sleep all day, I'll have a tough time tomorrow. Much work to do...

My new facebook friend Nancy Alcabes, was talking about the Old mop... Like he was dead. I like, to see him as, severely wounded... Maybe like Launcelot du Lac (I'm not sure this is the best, example.)

It has been a long couple years since then.

Over that 2 years, "The Mop" is a Wounded Warrior. By that I mean that, my life is very different now than it was then. Much Harder, Much less 'Flow'. These days, I tend to fall apart more. My life has Huge Stress.... That is the change, in "The Mop". I wish it wasn't so, but that is the way it is. I'd like to change it, and am working on it... But Reality is there, and you can't fight "What is"... or "The Izz"

.

All I know is this, Every day I have to Kick!... Kick and Spit and Piss. Fight every day, Fight every hour. Every hour of every day until I die.

You can't give up, you can't surrender... you have to fight.

Life is Pain, Life is Loss, life is destruction, Life is Fighting Entropy.

When all those people say "Breath".... YES! that is the first step.....

BREATH....

MAKE THAT HEART PUMP!

MAKE THOSE LEGS MOVE!

GET IT ON!

Make Life Happen, Let Life happen...

GAME ON!!!!

KEEP FIGHTING!!

ALLONS-Y!!!

Fight 'what is', and try and build 'what could be!'

You may not get what you want, or what you dream about... but you may get something better than what is....

But EVERY GOD-DAMN DAY!!

YOU HAVE TO SUIT UP AND PLAY!!!

The Stadium is out there!!!!!

Fat Tuesday..

I can't believe, what I have eaten....

My legs were toast today, they needed... 48 hours of Lay down...

Unfortunately... sitting on the couch or laying in bed, just ain't my bag.

and I'm not so sure about the Brain, that has been pushing them either. It's been Burning the candle at both ends for weeks. This stupid #30DaysOfOverTraining has not helped either.

So.... Time to eat... I had dinner twice... and I snuck out for some cookies and stuff.. graham crackers... Mmmmm Best not get addicted...

and I totally want to vomit....

I'm like the prom Queen, the weeks before the dance, Only Scruffier... and generally very angry.

I'm doing the First Endurance, Burke sent me... I feel a difference, but it's not like they shook the over-training away. There is a difference, Given more time, we will see how effective I think they are. So, far so good.

But Honestly, the Brownie I just ate...
I think is going to do wonders for my legs... BUT... I think I still need to stay off of them.

How about some fun!

Blog in Crisis

I was talking to my father the other day.

I said "I appreciate talking to you, But honestly I don't need to hear about every Meal, and Every fart you have"(ok, it was similar to these words) "If we talk, can't we talk about something interesting, All it does, is spoil the interesting conversations we have."

Then of course 3 hours later, I'm like.

"Damn... you know, 'the mop blog' is just you, talking like your dad... about every bowel movement and Breath you take."

..... Obviously we know it's true.... I'm going to try and be better... Still like a knife in my side...

But when you blog every day.... there has to be something. Maybe being better, will involve being quiet more......

Then the fun posts, will be better.

Stick to what I know.....

Which is little.

Facebook is wild, I didn't realize. One can while away a ton of time there. I am very sorry, I have yet to explore it fully. My time is so limited. It probably wouldn't be if I didn't twitter and blog so much..... Choices Choices Choices.

Spring cleaning time.... Which I'm mix in with all the other million things I'm doing. Then there is the garden, but everything is 90% clean... and then we can get to the Garden. Which is Amazing right now. What free time I have, I want to go out there and hang out, Go Barefoot with the dirt between my toes. Drink Coffee, and meditate on life. Great Stuff....

I cracked the windows here in the office, and in my room... Brrrrrrrr... and it's that Brilliant.... Chilly brrrrrr while I sleep, the kind that makes you cuddle up in bed. But it's a wonderful contrast with the, now warm days.

I have some new "Mop Games" I want to play. My time is Seriously screwed, right now, so I have yet to feel like I can add, this new layer of Bullshit to my life....

But ... We are getting to it.

I have to blog again

Somehow, this has become a pain in the ass...

There must be tons of things going on, in the old mop's life.

The next Big project is the Tilling, I'm very behind on the garden, But TOMATOES WILL ROLL!!!

Spring Cleaning is almost done, All the sets of winter Cycling Kit, are Clean and dry. I may run them through the dryer again. Be warned.... this usually means I have to sweat in them One more time!!

I'm sorry, this post kind of sucks......

The garden is starting to roll!!

y'all haven't seen it in a long time...

Spreading Compost....

Time to get the Tilling done!!!

SO..... The Mop now is on facebook I'm not psyched to, have yet another way to socially network, but I do like the ability to upload photo's, and there are more pictures of the garden on the page.

Long day

... I have 20 minutes left in this day, so I'm trying to blog...

Its hard to, match that last post!

.... Pause Pause Pause

Hey.... I blogged...

As "Bad Santa" says..... They all can't be winners now can they.

I am definitely, a Mad man in a Box.

Fist episode of Doctor Who just ended. Good stuff! Not any where near as bad as I expected!

I was going to message Burke this afternoon. I said this to Greg Steele, "I feel like I'm in a bike race, and everyone keeps crashing behind me because I'm not holding my line."

Probably better to say this to everyone.

The Return of The Mop! I think we are all in for it!

AKA...

What are we about to get ourselves into?

Because I am definitely.... A Mad Man in a Box!

The Doctor and his Tardis, next stop......

Everywhere!!

I had to post this again!

Shit is going to get broke!

pretend to blog

Can't ... get an adventure going tonight.... I tried.

Fuck it!

see if I can go to bed early this evening!

Hi blog!.... Skin of our Teeth

"Hi blog, How are you?"

blog, "I'm good, You?"

"Like you give a shit?"

"Where were we...?"

"It's friday... Decompressing."

"Whole world on our shoulders!....."

"Yep, wouldn't have it any other way."

"Get's to you by friday, though."

"Tough stuff."

"You decided to do this. Bring back 'The Mop', Turn your life up to 9 on the volume control."

"Yep, Fuck it, Skin of my Teeth! See how hard we can play, lets break something!"

"Still, The voices get you on friday."

"Don't be dramatic, AssWipe!, it's not like schizophrenia, they are just your/my(FUCKER!) inner voices."

"Doesn't stop you from freaking out, now and again, now does it?"

"No, but .... Huh!... What were you saying?"

"That wasn't as funny as you thought."

"I don't know, it had it's moment"

"Fuck you!"

"it has been an epic week....Again"

"Lets hear more about Fridays"

"What that everything on tv makes me want to puke!. Everything in the music archive, makes me want to kill..... And if a commercial came on, I would throw a shoe, or coffee cup. But the upside is ... I can't sleep either. If I lay down it's just the voices in my head."

"Oh, that has to be pleasant"

"They are My voices, what am I going to do?"

"REDRUM>>>>>REDRUM.........REDRUM........"

"Now that isn't as funny as you think."

"All work and no play make Jack a Dull Boy!" "Yes, this is very funny!"

"eh!..... Ok, A little funny!"

... quiet day

it's friday....

so... I'm going to punt here on a post.

I'm still recovering. I wanted to do 12 miles or so... and I wasn't feeling it.. I went 7... still repairing. still healing.

MillCreek Or bust

Made MillCreek, didn't get dropped, by Man or Skirt...

I heard a great Bowie song, while I was out..... Like you care.

It's about 7 Miles to the bottom of the valley, another 7 up to the mouth of Millcreek. I tend to stay on very Residential Roads. So I end up going up 45th south...
Which is brutal BTW... I crest it and i'm on Wasatch... at 90%... with drenched Glasses, usually encrusted with salt.

it's not clear past the parking lot... Which is good, gives me a reason to go back.

Honestly... I'm cooked...

I was thinking, the T-Bird should start a band... then he could tour with it Too. Either that or he could find people who can play and be part of the band, at the events..... Just a thought... I mean... he is doing everything... he could add this Right?

I may have to reach out to my contacts and find out if you can give Funeral Potatoes, to people who just had a baby. #ironyItsfunny

Oh! sidenote… former mormon friend made this thing that was chocolate Cake, fudge Frosting…

and somehow you Drenched the whole thing in caramel.

Then the paramedics showed up with the Insulin… and you ate another piece

It was a mormon Variation, she called it the Fudge Orgasm surprise, the mormons had a different name, but her addition was the Drenched in caramel.

In fact... I think this is it, I think

TRIPLE CHOCOLATE FUDGE CARAMEL CAKE- it's under the quiche

If someone asks what your favorite cake is.... ya... shut up... this is it!!

Risotto Done!

Sausage Pea...... There is a reason ..... I rode MillCreek!

ya, it was the big grin.... But.... Look at that thing!

beautiful day

I wanted to just do a quick ride today... I doubled it, then doubled it again.

It was nice...

that is all I have.

Good day on my end. I want to do Millcreek tomorrow... it's one hell of a ride just to get there, from west jordan.

I was thinking today that I should just keep it simple, and just put out more, regardless of consequences...

I'm not psyched about it... I was just thinking about it. I also seem to be voting against it. I was also thinking about Calling another woman, and going out this weekend, but you know how that works, I'll do that, and "The 'Days of our Lives' woman" will call up, want to know what I'm doing.

Sure enough.. I get a phone call tonight, and it's a woman I know.

Get this...

her, "do you want to go to my son's Soccer game on saturday"

me, "So that I can seen, with you, by your ex-husband."(I mean, we know i'm a super hero.) Also her Ex is a DickHead.

her, "oh..."

Me, (got her on that one)" But did you want to do something else."

Her, "Ya, lets go for a hike... but I don't want to go to the mountains, so lets go check out the parkway, But not Saturday... Sunday."

Me, " Alright! " 20 minutes later... I realize, we are taking a romantic Sunday walk, on the jordan river parkway, no less. Second.... This sounds like we are "Having a Talk".

Isn't this how woman work, you start out, there is a nice thing going, Next thing you know you are fighting about...

The best one is from, the jennifer aniston-vince Vaughn movie

"Why would I wan't to do the dishes"

"I want you to' Want' to do the dishes."

Ok... seriously.... I want to do the dishes...

Today Needs an Ass kicking!!

Sorry to my, more sensitive Readers. I am trying to "Be Better" about swearing. For the most part there are better ways.

I was looking through the Kubler-Ross Model on loss.

1. Denial
2. Anger
3. Bargaining
4. Depression
5. Acceptance

For the most part, One jumps around. But I've always been a huge fan of this model. There are also Micro trends.

I seem to be Angry today.... But in the past weeks, I also seem to remember doing some bargaining.

I also want to point out that... After being depressed about something, One tends to get angry... Sort of angry about being depressed, or angry at one's self... but once you have that kind of energy... usually the depression is over.

And you move into acceptance... I felt I moved into acceptance on "Days of our lives" days ago.

It feels like it... But I guess kicking back to some anger.... bla bla bla

The horror show would be if, I'm just getting to anger.

But.... I just think this day needs an Ass-Kicking!

Hell with that dumb chick.... I'm a great guy... she is effing stupid... Good LORD!!

Not only am I a Great guy... I'm an amazing person, and personality.

To Quote Billy Joel... "I may be a lunatic, but i may just be the lunatic, Y'all are looking for!"

Pissed off!!!

I'm Pissed off for someone, I'm not going to mention names, I'd imagine it would be ok.

There is a reason there were Unions, If you hire someone, they should have to commit for a year, or you get paid for a year... Unless there is some kind of Gross Douchbaggery!!!

One of these days, he is going to find a job that lets him be him......

I'm not sure what that is..... but.....

FUCKERS!!!!!!!!!

That is it... I'm with the TeaBaggers.... Fuck this shit!!!! (no idea what this means(ok, it's an epic Ironic Joke))

Athletic

I love a good rain, Wash the sins of the world away. It's raining here. It never rains here, and when it does..... I always say "It's like the Earth, is Sweating", it's never enough to wash it all clean, so it just mixes with the dust, and everything is sort of covered with Grease.

There was a documentary on about "Utah work", about some of the jobs people are doing, about the recession. They did a piece about the people who stand in front of the Tax places and turn the sign. There was something about, finding dignity in any work... I'd agree take pride in your work.

They then had a part about "Following your bliss", then they made a modifier "Follow your Blisters". Here is the thing, whatever you work at, you have to be willing to suffer, so if it's something you are willing to suffer for, something you enjoy.... I think that is the thing to do. When you do it, you should fill fulfilled.

Bliss

Ignorance is bliss, Contentment, Satisfaction...

I umn.... was looking today.... I'm finally Athletic... I still have weight to drop, but... I'll never be 150, or 160.... People would beat me up... Do you have any idea, what an asshole I am?

Days of our lives?

I know I said I wouldn't .... about it. It feels over for some reason. I only fall in love about every 5 years, its seems. A friend said to me, "Mop(Right, my friends call me mop ;p ), you are right where you are supposed to be", Ugh.... Karmicly... which I don't believe in, I've lived a life that would deserve Sainthood, or be the Greatest Man in Utah.... Ya, I believe in Chaos... It makes way more sense.

Whatever the sense is..... In all this...

“This guy’s walking down the street when he falls in a hole. The walls are so steep he can’t get out.

“A doctor passes by and the guy shouts up, ‘Hey you. Can you help me out?’ The doctor writes a prescription, throws it down in the hole and moves on.

“Then a priest comes along and the guy shouts up, ‘Father, I’m down in this hole can you help me out?’ The priest writes out a prayer, throws it down in the hole and moves on

“Then a friend walks by, ‘Hey, Joe, it’s me can you help me out?’ And the friend jumps in the hole. Our guy says, ‘Are you stupid? Now we’re both down here.’

The friend says, ‘Yeah, but I’ve been down here before and I know the way out.’”

Keep Fighting, The adventure continues.....

Oh... Sandros... decided to try and do some Blogging... I'm very excited

And Greg Steele

Meditation on Salvation

2 Wheeled Salvation

(Respect to the Blog of the 2 Wheeled Salvation.)

Love Salvation.

Family Salvation

Adventure Salvation.

Religious Salvation.

Blog Salvation.

Twitter Salvation.

Money Salvation.

sal·va·tion (sl-vshn)

n.

1.

a. Preservation or deliverance from destruction, difficulty, or evil.

b. A source, means, or cause of such preservation or deliverance.

2. Christianity

a. Deliverance from the power or penalty of sin; redemption.

b. The agent or means that brings about such deliverance.

From Wiki

In religion, salvation is the concept that God or other Higher Power, as part of Divine Providence, saves humanity from spiritual death or Eternal Damnation by providing for them an eternal life (cf. afterlife). The world's religions agree that humanity needs salvation from its present condition. However, they hold irreconcilable positions on what it means from an eternal perspective to become saved, the actual way to get saved, and the resources needed to attain salvation.[1]

But... are these just the tools we use, real salvation is internal...

... These are the ways we express it.

... or these are the tools we use, in our salvation.

maybe Salvation in all things....

(I'm not psyched about this post... it doesn't feel very clear)

I'm out of stuff to blog...

There is a great post about Piper Virginia Barrett out there. What a Cutie!! Heart Breaker already.

The garden has started... Ready or not...

Yesterday was amazing, full shorts.... great day for a ride, today was overcast, but ok temp wise.

Blew my first tube, I may switch to 12oz CO2 They are cheep, and you only get one charge anyways. They happen in 3's right.... So if I tried to refill a flat tube from my bag?

is that number 2?

Well, Keep fighting Mop... Allons-y

Riding update

I had a full day of trying to get started on the garden, it was good to start. I seem to have about 3 jobs, right now. I only stop, long enough to Joke, or to ride the bike.

It was so nice, and I'm doing 30 days of riding or 30 days of cycling, I moved out for a few miles. Originally I thought I'd just do a couple miles, but since it was a day for shorts, I felt like there were a few miles in my legs, I even turned off and put in a few more, just because it was so nice.

Well... sure I felt good... I had a tail wind...

It was still nice on the way back... But a surprise how hard it was.

I talked to Ryan, about diet. I'm working 3 jobs... etc... and trying to get riding in. This is why i've been off the bike for the past 2 years. It's been too stressful to add the biking, But I'm convinced that I'm going to do it, or have a nervous breakdown... or blow up or something...

it's going to work, or something is going to give out.... We will see what it is... Even I have 50/50 it will be my head.... LOL

I with all the stress, i've been going out on no fuel. I eat yogurt and fruit for breakfast, and start drinking a pot of coffee. By the time I can get out for a ride, I just go... and I'm spent... and feel drained.... but I still love it. My diet concern was that I would consume the hard won muscle in my legs. On friday I went out and did 3.5 hours, and had nothing but a water bottle. I bonked at 5 or 10 miles and just suffered.

What ryan said, is that some guys swear by it, By training with no fuel, and droping weight, pushing metabolism.... etc...

Well, Let me say that it's true....

My metabolisum is so high, that I eat anything, and my energy level goes through the Roof! I've been fighting for 2 days to keep things on an even Keel. If I eat 1000 calories at a meal, I just Blow through the roof.

The rides are Rough... It's not all that bad, since the endorphins kick in on the ride, but you are still "Tanked". But Keeping from .... knocking down walls after Meals is .... Rough.

So... I think if you ask me about this kind of training.... "Riding On no Fuel"... I would not recommend it, it's not much fun, and it's hard to adjust to. It's tough on the head.

But it seems to do, just what it should, throws the MBR into overdrive, and helps to drop weight like mad.....

but... keep your hands and feet, inside the ride at all times!!!

Allons-y.... Keep Fighting...

Goodness

I just read the past few post.... WOWW!!!!! THEY SUCK!!!

I'll try and do better in the future.

Sandy got me going, yesterday. I can be a bit of a hypochondriac, especially when it comes to my brain. I worry, I over analyse.... The whole bit.

I'm constantly obsessing about my mental health, how can you be "The Mop" and not ask a ton of "hard questions" about who you are and what you are doing. I don't doubt I'm a bit of a Nut.

He was worried I had gone manic. I'd pay money for a good manic. Not that I'm on the other side, It's just having a ton of energy to do a ton of crap would be great. I spend 2 hours working out, and 2 hours trying to recover. I spend 3 hours trying to wake up. The rest of my time, I spend working. I've gotten up at 4am-6am for 3 years... It's my usual time... most of you get up from 6-8... I'm just 2 hours ahead... and I normally go to bed at about 9 or 10... sometimes I Take an afternoon nap.

That is my life.... and I'm trying to "Have a life!"

Fighter pilots have a saying, about living on the "Edge of the envelope". For the past 4 months, i've been trying to not hold back.

I'm trying to see how close I can get to the edge....

I push it a bit from time to time...

I can feel myself start to fall...

and I pull back.

I've known that it was going to be difficult...

Nothing worth having is easy...

if it was easy... you would already have it.

But that edge is right there.... I can spit and see it fall.

Hopefully I don't fall off..... but maybe that is the big car wreck this blog has been looking for....

I'm willing to find out.... Lets hope for the best... and see how it works out

Game over!!

Well not me.... I know I've said it a few times... I had to dig deep... I talked to a friend of mine, she made me understand it.

Regardless of what people say or do.... If they really want to be together.... If Tiger Woods Really loved his wife. He wouldn't have cheated.

If she wanted, if she really wanted to be with me....

She would have done the same thing I was willing to do.... We would have both "Tried" to moveheaven and earth to be together.

And it's that Easy!!!

Let us hope this is the end of all these episodes of "Days of our lives"

Recovery

I'm..... trying to recovery from yesterday....

My body wants me to Carb Load Like mad...

I never realized that the trouble, with diets, is keeping a "Binge" away. Eating just enough carbs to satiate me. Just enough.... or a little more than enough to satiate... But not, go to the bakery and get a load of "Day Olds" and Binge....

I feel an early ride this morning,

Well this answers it:

Piper Virginia Barrett, welcome to the world! 10 fingers, 10 toes. 20″ and 7lbs and 6ounces. Mom and baby are doing well. Dad is beat!!

big question of the day.... Good Mojo, and my love to the Barretts

(See Ryan, I did a great job on the post... 2 Rs and 2 Ts, I managed it, and didn't have to double check)

K... just going to put some nice miles in the legs...

My name for Ryan.... is "Not My Coach!"..... I have no idea why I think it's funny.

I guess it's because, if he was my coach, he would be in a slight way responsible for my poor performance and fitness. And I'd have to pay him for asking all my dumb questions.

Me "I can't manage to ride in weather under 45 degrees"

Him "Wear a heavier jacket."

Me, "Oh! good idea"

(Ok, to be honest, he said 'go big on top', and followed it up by saying: Keep your core warm, and it will take care of the rest of your limbs, Which is very true.)

Back to Neutral....And Pillow Fights

These are the days of our lives... Episode 23

Well, Escalation of the game, seems to have "Sort of Worked" for the time Being. I guess it's just a game of "Stick and Move"..... I have no idea what that means.

I took off today, and seem to have started Training block 3, I guess training Block 3 starts where 2 ended. Only I did it on 2/3 a pot of coffee, and a yogurt... and I brought no bike food. I was going to eat a waffle, but it didn't happen. Then for some reason... I just had to get out... Again... I wanted "Some kind of adventure...." So I took a 3 hour walk. I was going to ... I don't know what I was going to do. I was toying with Eating Sushi, then I was toying with Beer and wings. Only, when that first drop of beer and those wings hit my tongue.... I think I will be a downhill game, or I'll give up... or I'll stop fighting.... I just know the game will change... and I may not be able to hold on.

Then there was the idea of Sushi... only the problem with sushi... I just... It seemed lame sushi in West Jordan is... Well, it's like a freak show... but a quiet one.

Eating Sushi Vs. Beer and wings..... Well, that is more like a Pillow Fight Vs. a Real Adventure

Either that or.... maybe i'm still Cautious about ... I'm tired... and I'm working on it...

and all we are talking about is some sushi.

Ugh.....4.0

I spent part of my morning explaining this to someone:

You have to Look for things,

Then you have to See them,

Then you have to act on them.

Seems simple right?

I then spent 30 min... listening to a bunch of melt down crying and rationalization about how that isn't the way it is...

I guess somehow Magic... puts things things in other peoples lap.... and they just "Have them"

I guess the world I live in, where I have to work for everything, and grind things out.... and Earn them.... And even then, I sometimes don't get them.

I guess My world is different....

I'm ready to Punch a Hole in a Wall!!

Wall Climb

It's like running an Indy Car, in the slow lane sometimes....

That is what today feels like, today.




There are a ton of cross Currents in here, in the market.

And.... It feels like I need to get out.... Beat the hell out of myself, Because I'm ready to Chew Steel, Eat Barb Wire, Crap Razor Blades......

It's either that or climb the walls.

Ugh.... Lets put the Hammer to it.

Cooked, These are the Days Of Our Lives.

I was thinking today, that I needed to kick it up a notch.

Oh! Still No Word from, 'The great Red Dragon'(The one from a 15 years ago.). The Woman that, for some reason, I may be projecting a Persona on, this new woman (old projection on a new woman).

Honestly, if the old "SHE" felt the "Vibes" I was throwing out, It was best for her to run. I hope I at least made 'her shit, a little loose for a few days'. and isn't that just a very negative thought.

The other Charming woman...This new one.... There is just weird... I'm not sure, I'm playing the game on the right level. Except, I'm on this other thing about "Clear Intent". Which is a game of 'no game'. Of Course, with that, is an assumption that she can play 'that way'.

Right... So it's either escalation of the game, or go back to clear intent. It's the two opposite ends of the universe, Or dark Matter Vs. Physical.

There is this other..

Hamster rolling around in my brain...

It's not the failure..... It's the lost Opportunity... Failure is not a problem... It's the fear that I'm not Making use of an opportunity.

And that the problem is, I'm trying to make "Frightened little bunny" , take a chance.(BTW.. I don't know if this is an Over share... BUT I DON"T KNOW IF THAT IS ME OR HER, I'M TALKING ABOUT!)

You will always miss 100% of the shots you don't take..... that is the axiom.... btw... it's thoughts like this that get woman stalked..... but of course, there are the woman who like a good stalker.

In which case the trick is to, build some neutral ground.... or something

FUCK!!! MORE MEDIATION!

Or not.... Try and figure out, if I should just nut up and ride.... Or something....

have to take a shower and see if my nuts are still attached.... JESUS.... YOU SEE THE ... See If I have Real Balls, and will leave this post up....

Tired....

How did I get so tired today! I'm doing a miserable job Eating, Yogurt and Coffee... I was screwed out on the bike... that and a 2 a day.

It has me finished...

I think I need a cookie.

I think the picture of my leg is freaking everyone out... Ok... Maybe it's freaking me out.

Fragile

There is nothing wrong with an adventure!

But you still have to keep the rubber side down!... No that isn't dirty talk. it's keep your wheels on the road.

I was talking to a friend a few weeks ago,

she mentioned how we are all just little Bunny-rabbits

Scared little Bunny-rabbits

Seems true, with the exception of those trying to Over Compensate, and trying to pretend they aren't.

For those of you who... hate Sting... Tough shit!... don't click play... and stop reading now.

So, How about a little Sting... and a little Fragile.

If blood will flow when flesh and steel are one

Drying in the colour of the evening sun

Tomorrow's rain will wash the stains away

But something in our minds will always stay

Perhaps this final act was meant

To clinch a lifetime's argument

That nothing comes from violence and nothing ever could

For all those born beneath an angry star

Lest we forget how fragile we are

On and on the rain will fall

Like tears from a star like tears from a star

On and on the rain will say

How fragile we are how fragile we are

On and on the rain will fall

Like tears from a star like tears from a star

On and on the rain will say

How fragile we are how fragile we are

How fragile we are how fragile we are

Not in form yet.

But those are the Unshaved legs of an amateur cyclist.

30 days of riding

I guess I decided to to a 2 a day. @soozed complained about not doing her 30 days of riding. I figured the 2-a-day and some proxy Riding was in order. I also thought, I may as well do 30 days of riding, this month, it's only 4-6 more days of riding this month than I was already planning.... And I love a good, internet MEME.

Just a Primmer on Rollers; This is how to set up your bike for rollers. Place it in a doorframe, so that your elbows can be used to keep you upright, as you start. After some months on the rollers you won't need it. Also, having fewer objects to fall on, when you lose concentration, is a good thing too, so Mind the place where you are going to fall.

The other trick is to GO FAST!!! sounds crazy, but until the rear wheel is spinning at 15-20mph, it will have a hard time generating the centripetal force to keep you upright. Word is... Riding Rollers is like a Hippo on a TightRope.
This all means... RIDE A BIG GEAR!!! it sounds strange but.... GO fast!
Hopefully you have the rollers set up properly for the bike. The instructions should have shown you how.

just to show my poor fitness in 20 minutes of riding I pushed myself to LT 5 times. Oh... and put a rag over your headset.. because all that salty sweat... bad for the bike. and you will need it, to keep the sweat from covering everything. I can't keep the bike upright unless I'm doing at least 16mph.

Rollers teach;

• a complete pedal stroke, since it helps to keep you upright.
• It's also like working with a power Tap, since constant power is required.
• It teaches Focus, since if you don't keep your mind on what you are doing, you will end up in a heap of bike, roller, floor, and sometimes door/doorframe
• Bike Handling-After a few weeks of rollers, Holding a Line, is no problem.

Worst Ride ever!

.... Well we know how, fucking unhinged I am, right now. I was out on the bike, and the wheels came off. Not literally.

I have my shortest route, and I turn off to do a few more miles, like 15-20 and not 7. I'm still not on the proper training and the training block... well, if it's all I can do to get on the bike... it's all I can do.

But I turn off, Left turn instead of right, Uphill instead of Down My spirit just Bonks. and I ass-dragged for the whole distance....Truth is, I certainly need the time to think, but it was cold out there.

Probably need to hit the Vitamin B....

that is all I have.... Long shower...

Web Blogging 2.0

We are trying to bring back 2006! and the great Web blog Revolution.

Who is we? Great Question.

Seems like the Eternal Question....

WHO ARE YOU?

WHAT'S IT ALL ABOUT?

WHO IS THIS "THEY" WE KEEP TALKING ABOUT?

I think that isn't the question.... the question is...

"are YOU ready to bring back blogging?"

The big complaint I have, is that my writing has deteriorated into Half paragraph Emails and 140 character Tweets. I need to do better, I expect better, and Y'all are becoming retarded with your writhing.(No offence Sarah Palin... Ok... F-You Sarah Palin)

Today Church of the big ring agreed to try and "Blog More", and as we know Ryan Turbo is in. So momentum is building. I imagine more people are trying. and Ryan and I are trying to blog every day, since it's easier to remember if it's just a daily Habit.... At least for me.

I even threw Art a link on the side of the blog, Originally that list was created based on people who wanted to do Poetry Friday!

So... we don't have to "Blog every day"... but trying more, and trying to be more "Literate" I think is a good thing.

And I'll try not to talk as much about my Bowels.

I guess the other goal, is to try and give feedback, and be supportive....(damn... it's like we are chicks sometimes.)

Hopefully this will go better than the "Return of BellBottoms" or "Pet rocks"

Return of the White lotus.

Seems like, my shit is getting back together.

I warn you, I'm listening to Sting.

I don't even know, what I wrote last night. I know, I ended up discombobulated, which is what I'm now coming down from. In my adventures, I drank half a bottle of wine. I only drink Quarterly, if that, during the year.

I'm not up to reading, whatever it was. As 'Bad Santa' said, "They can't all be winners, now can they. Referring to my posts. We have had some good ones this week. So, a sort of melt down, isn't all that bad. It's been a Hectic spring, and it seems like there is more fight in this old heart, so a little..... discord is ok.

I keep thinking about taking a writing class, I need some bitchy teacher to throw a ton of red ink on things I write.... Give me the proper discipline I so badly need, with my writing. That kind of sounded dirty didn't it?

No word from the "Great Red Dragon, of my Demons.", I realized it seems like she is in for it, as I woke up this morning, I realized I didn't exactly have anything good to say to her.

I need more adventures.... No cops, but... More... Life... more love.... More energy!...

Bruce Wayne's Bat Cave here, doesn't seem to be able to hold me, these days.

I'm not sure i want to share the details of last night's date. On the bike,today, I sort of realized it was the "Rebound" thing.

I seem to be over the "Other thing", Of course there will be continued developments. The problem I have, is that I tend to be out the door, faster than most people. "Ok! we broke up? Sounds great! Don't let the door hit you in the ass, on the way out!"

and that is it.... beyond that, there is the groveling they don't want to do.

Been trying to....

I've been working on this post for hours.

Escalation.

I have no idea, where you are, and my most recent.... I'm trying, so hard to be nice.

I umn... Received and email, from the..... Little Woman.

I'm very mixed up right now, ... and It has my head spinning.

I don't know what to write about it....

I'm mostly over it... It's like I'm leaving a window Ajar. This I imagine is a mistake.

I've never had that "Hate vs Hate" relationship. My relationships, are generally about love, Maybe that is the problem here, Maybe with some people, there is so much hate and anger.... It's just ... Some people have something called "Emotional Vocabulary" maybe there is only those 2 or three for some people. maslow's hierarchy of One dimensional Emotions.... and it is all hate and Anger and Fear and that is it.

Many Years ago, there was a woman, and she ..... I really hate her. There are some people, who see themselves as so untouchable. Me.... I don't give a shit! But the problem comes, when "She", decides, that I don't give a shit about her... Which is true.. But suddenly she thinks that is compelling. Then wants me to pay attention to her.... And once I do, then that is it... She has what she needs, and she moves on....

I've delt with this same personality type many times, and they hate that you know the game.

That has been my question... Is that the game... Is that what I've been playing at....

and worse... anything I say... tends to be an escalation... Its like some kind of challenge of perfection.....

I don't know about you, but I know I'm turning into my dad.. I know the impulse... and it's there... and it's not unless you realize it, that you can deal with it... but it will always be a nagging Monkey on your back.

Ahhhhh..... Heck!!!(hey... I'm trying not to swear like a sailor)... I know most of this doesn't make much sense... and it's just Rantings....

Like I said.... she just.... It's just the Nonsense... and the Nonsense I was trying to avoid... but she couldn't do it.

I seem to be mostly over it....

I'm moving on.... I know there is better than this.... I know I'm due... something better than this.

Here is the new drama, the old Girlfriend, from 14 years ago... the one I really hate.... Well, I just emailed her. If i'm lucky, she won't answer..... I guess if I'm Exercising demons.... I best Bring out the GrandDaddy!!! THE GRAND RED DRAGON OF My DEMONS. I guess if we are going to play this game... or if I'm going to play this one... I may as well summon the Grand Daddy of all my Demons.

I've seen things... you people wouldn't believe!!

Something

.....

There is a new Doctor Who, I could search the internets for it...

Some things are like a fine wine, the right time and place.

Third Training Block.

We are... the weather messed with the start, and I'm getting Knee pain. I should do some adjustments. The real problem is when I have easy days, and I just want to hammer it. It's putting more stress on my knees than they can take. I need to get them built up. and I can't push until I'm less sore. The ibuprofin is at full levels right now.

I built the new playlist for spring.

all the usual.

It's a tight list.

Selected pink floyd

sting(selected)

Police(selected)

recontours

Black Keys

U2 Joshua Tree

Billy Joel(selected)

Bauhaus(selected) and "The sky's gone out"

some stuff you would hate.

It's just stuff I love right now, stuff to make me happy on the bike.

The MP3 has a few books on tape, and complete selections of quite a few different bands, depending on how I feel.

Ok.... I can Confess... I put in my Avril Lavigne and rode today. I have a .... I dig chick music.. I listen to plenty of Jazz, and Metallica.

Don't you Judge me!!! Ok, I know you do.... but I'm man enough... To A) Kick your ass B) be comfortable with digging some chick music.

SO CLOSE YOUR EYES!!!!

"I Can Do Better"

Uh, yeah you can do it

I didn't give a damn what you say to me
I don't really care what you think of me
Cause either way you're gonna think what you believe
There's nothing you could say that would hurt me

I'm better off without you anyway
I thought it would be hard but I'm OK
I don't need you if you're gonna be that way
Because with me, it's all or nothing

I'm sick of this shit, don't deny
You're a waste of time
I'm sick of this shit, don't ask why

[Chorus]
I hate you now
So go away from me
You're gone, so long
I can do better, I can do better
Hey, hey you
I found myself again
That's why you're gone
I can do better, I can do better

You're so full of shit
I can't stand the way you act
I just can't comprehend
I don't think that you can handle it
I'm way over, over it

I will drink as much lemoncello as I can
And I'll do again and again
I don't really care what you have to say
Cause you know, you know you're nothing

(I'm so sick)
I'm sick of your shit, don't deny
You're a waste of time
I'm sick of your shit, don't ask why

[Chorus]

[Bridge]
What'd you say
I told you so
You know that
Cause I always know
Get outta my face
Hey hey
You're not my taste
Hey hey
I am so
Sick of you
You're on my nerves
I want to puke
Get outta my face
Hey hey
You're not my taste
Hey hey
Hey hey
Hey hey

[Chorus X2]

Allons-y

Allons-y
French

Phrase
allons-y IPA: /a.lɔ̃.z‿i/
(informal, first person plural, imperative) let's go
(informal, first person plural, imperative) let's go there
(informal, imperative) come with me, follow me

Related terms
vas-y (second person singular)
allez-y (second person plural or formal)

Before I start....

YOU FUCKING PEOPLE NEED TO LEARN HOW TO COOK!

Somebody gave me a Stew, and it has no seasoning,

everything is cooked to shit! and it has Meat Potatoes and carrots.

Even the fucking carrots have been overcooked to the point, they taste of nothing!

Ok, that is off my chest.

I ate nothing today, 6 cups of coffee and 8 potato chips. I pulled off 30 miles in the wind. This of course, ignores the big cup of chocolate milk I had last night, and the Bagel sandwich I had for dinner.

Ok.... On task.

It was a few months ago, 2 people called for work, and an acquaintance(formerly a friend) was almost killed in an avalanche. Suddenly, a whole nightmare of "Hauntings" came at me. Somehow I knew that it was going to be a "Spring of Hauntings".

I remarked to a friend today, sometimes when people want change, they get a haircut. They have cause and effect backwards, they want change, and are going to do things to make it happen. The haircut is just a symptom of a desire for change, that is being acted on. Obviously I draw the parallel that "The Spring of Hauntings" was more that I was going to deal with these things.

So here I am, Back on the bike, Kicking and Pissing, and Grinding for that change. Tired of Bullshit. Ready to dance!

My new Battle cry!....

Allons-y

LET'S GO!!!

Bring it!!!!

Cry Havoc and let slip the dogs of war!

HAVE LIVES..!!!!

FALL IN LOVE!!!!

HAVE AN ADVENTURE!!!!!

PEE OUTSIDE!!!!!

GO TO A NEW COFFEE SHOP!!!

EAT BAD FOOD, FROM A DIRTY MEXICAN FOOD CART!!!
MAKE LOVE IN THE RAIN!!!!
ALLONS-Y!!!!!!!!

Over it

Some real garbage on TV

What was I going to write...

It didn't make any fucking sense to me, that I wasn't running off with my Girlfriend, for the weekend....

Not in the cards....

I always think that my mistake is thinking that .... the person who does that, Or gets to do that, is going to be me.

Keep Fighting Mop...

Keep Fighting Don Quixote