1 down 2 to go

Well, the first holiday is tomorrow. Yipeee...

eh... I had a whole whine I was going to work up.. I think I'd rather lay down and take a shower or something..

Ramblings

Ugh.... I feel like hell. Maybe I've got something again....

I've whined about it before, but Fridays aren't my day.... and after struggling fitfully for 24 hours... I still feel like crap.

I could use a good cry... that sounds pathetic... and probably is.

Well, I think I'll try and drink a gallon of water and see if it makes me feel better...

hoping the problem is all the cookies and soda I've been drinking... ya... I know, and even I can't explain it.....

The Ruturn of the Legend

Looks like The Bird has returned to blogging. I felt as though I should Mark the Occasion. ... I'm hoping the powers that be will provide me with something interesting to write...

those are the kinds of things I type to try and inspire some .... thinking.

as much as I've tried... sorry, my friend... the curser just blinks at me ..... Taunting!

But I'll try as long as you try!!!

all about me right!!!

Nightmare

Sometimes, one wakes up in the middle of the night from a nightmare. Your heart is beating, mind running a million miles per hour. For the past half hour you have been running from Vampires or Zombies... Evil Step Sister... A thousand naked woman throwing little pickles at you(The horror here is that this is a joke from a movie I was making fun of somebody for quoting, and it's 25 years old, and ... they are trying to reclaim their lost youth).

You wake up, Heart and mind going a thousand miles per hour... Only that is how I wake up. 3am on a saturday, and no I wasn't being chased by zombies... I just woke up. I have nothing to do... but laundry...

all I really want is to get about 4 more hours of sleep... and to wake up refreshed.

Probably isn't going to happen.. but I'll probably lay back in bed and wish for some real sleep.

This was a letter.....

I have the pork thing, the one you had such a clever name for.... PorkFlu, Porkchop Fever! I can't remember. It has my head in a Vice, sort of a confused haze. I need to rest up and get over it as quickly as possible, but Rest just gives me too much time to reflect, and wallow in misery. I can almost smell it. Does the Swine flu have a smell?

I'm watching 'To Gillian on her 37th birthday.' It seems ok, but all I can think of is that I was 20 something when it came out, and has Michelle Pfeiffer in it, and apparently she is 37, looking good but reminds me of how old I am.... "Am I that old" "Am I old enough to be a professor and live on a beach, to have had a wonderful wife die, and have a 16 year old daughter." And yet here I sit, wallowing in what it is to be me. Anyways, who can live up to these Hollywood fantasies?

Struggling with fantasies I guess. This is going to sound strange, but I just want to exist. Just want to ... be there and be a person, have a life like everyone else. But it seems like that is the fantasy, that I am what I am, Where I am. It's best probably to just let it all be.

Just keep fighting and let it all be, I guess.

White hot Mop acton.

Beat... I'm beaten like an old mule...

Not complaining I do it to myself. I did sneak out and watch a movie. you know I can't just drive and see a movie. I have to walk 3 miles, with the mp3 player get some exercise, then I can eat some wings, and see a movie.....

That is a big Saturday night for me... ends about 7pm.

I intend to make enchiladas and chili reanos tomorrow. No idea how to do the chili things.. stuff peppers with cheese I guess..

Shit!!! I'm sorry blog.... I tried!

(seriously if you want to know why I don't write much.... this is it... this is how it comes out, and I just want to suck my thumb and watch news about Jon and Kate.. Ok I'm kidding, but not... It's more that I'd love to do something so mindless, but my mind won't let me. But in all honesty, i'm 100% up to date with jon and kate and baloonboy drama!)

Ugh... of a week

Too much is going on...

and there is something else going on out there, that I'm too .... You know... Keep fighting buddy... Keep fighting..

Tough to keep going on about my bullshit...

I actually wrote a story, which I can't share, it's ok. I'm going to try and write more. and I'm toying with submitting them for publication.

My writing has become so broken. I need to start writing in story format.

Keep going everyone, try and keep the good Energy going.

Hi Blog!

When there is nothing else, there is the old blog.....

Yep made it all the way to that phrase, The old words just don't run out of the tips of my fingers like they used to..... I wish it could be so.... just for the Cleansing of it... or whatever that word is Catharsis!!!!!

I was feeling a little backed up, went after a fiber cereal, and fortunately some company has mixed sugar with fiber and now it's good for me... Right...

Seriously, i'm running at like an 11 on a 1-10 emotional scale...

Seems like the hate mongers and the fear merchants are doing their best to get the country all worked up.....

always seems easy to me, try and watch who is filled with the most Lies and Hate... and stay away from them....

not that they then shouldn't be hated...

I'm just saying; if you think that Obama is Hitler, and there is some mass conspiracy by ACORN for Kenyan Black panthers to overthrow the U.S. government, and put the white folk in FEMA deathcamps.

You either need to spend a weekend coming to your senses, or get some help...

but for sure the fear merchants are out there trying to use it to get what they want...

this is the nonsense that has me on an 11 on the old emotional volume meter.

ok... I may be joining the Freepers!

But the rocket scientists in congress have now decided to pull off... what I expected.

The solution to health care, is to give more money to insurance companies.

most probably outcome is forcing people into "Insurance Programs" that are low end, So that Minor injuries will be covered but anything Major will still cause bankruptcy. Unless of course people want to spend half their income on a Decent program.

we will see if it's a "Tax Break" or a "Tax Credit" and how much but I doubt it will be larger than 5K.. what is that $400 a month.

apparently the breaks come if you are paying over 15% for health care.

which should be easy since lower middle class is 30K per family, and median health expenses are 15K.

so there could be up to a 4K dollar penalty to not have insurance....

bla bla bal CBIATWT

Tired... not up for a post... I feel good on the bike, though my cleat position is FUCKED UP... Need to work on it... just in time to buy some new shoes!!! LOL.

Decided to do some climbing today. Don't get too excited! no flats in like 50 or 60 miles.. so that is good! The legs were sore...

what is funny is that for 6 warmup miles I feel like crap, then finaly I settle in and things are fine!

Melanie Odin Kicked ass today, definatly a top 10 player... it will take some time for the other players to get her game Dialed in, then we will see how she really does... but she has a "For REAL" game. many of the top womans players got the USOPEN "GO BIG OR GO HOME!" and ended up on the losing end.

Funny how my jokes get sort of spoiled on Twitter... With Odin of the USA and her trying to go through all these russian woman.... I commented "It's like the old 1980's cold war days, only they brought the Sexy!"

It's thursday, and the week has piled up, HAVE to get some of the Lingering shit done tomorrow. Maybe if I get it done I can get a good puke on.... spent the first part of the week doing maintinence instead of getting projects done.... so that is where I am...

What a shit post... oh... up the hill today some MTB caught my wheel... lasted a few minutes and I sort of left him on the dangle... cause I was fucking tired.... Then I kicked the bike into top gear and let it shred!! It was sad actually!... for both of us!

Like I said, felt good for a guy who feels like he is getting kicked all day!

If your managed to read through this whole thing!!! Thank you ... and I'm sorry!!! The 80's thing was good.... It's what I have and it's all there is....

then I came home and i Can't Believe I Ate The Whole Thing!

Kicking me!!

Generally these days I get on my bike and when I'm not getting flat tires.... I feel like somebody has been kicking me.

But let me talk about my tire 15 miles brand new tube and it blew out the side of the tube, no pinch flat, no thorn. I suspect the threadwarn sides of the tires have been destroying my tubes.. that and the thorns...

So I switch out the tires, and have some nice fresh ones... of course I think I put 800 miles on those tires, but probably the last time I underpay for something with TDF on it. They were ok for a while...

well out on the bike... don't get me wrong I feel "Ok" it's just I get out there and I feel like somebody has been mentally kicking me all day... I don't work 16 hours a day because My life is all kitty cats and and rainbows.

I guess sparkles too.

In college I had a party at my house, this couple that were "friends of friends" came over, and I fell asleep. woke up later that night and I found The wife Kicking her Husband over and over again.... "WHY WON'T YOU FUCK ME! ALL THOSE GUYS OUT THERE WILL! *whomp* *whomp* "WHY WON'T....." *whomp* *whomp*...

JESUS... i THINK I KNOW WHY LADY!!!

ever since that has been my nightmare. Be married and fall asleep only to wake up with my wife kicking me repeatedly

Yes Mr Missionary the rules apply to you too.

had a miserable ride... I blame it on Jesus... or Pie...

You know I sit down thinking I'm going to write up something Brilliant... I start banging away and ... Feels like the balloon is flat.

See I have to have the framework of what I want to say, then break it into some nice funny observations.

I tend to be so tired I just want to bang it all out... no Nuance, no Joy...

So I'm riding, and I look up and have 2 hefty weight Missionaries Bearing down on me... and of course they think I should thread the needle between their asses as they come. I point to the other side of the road... Both of them Fucking wave at me. I pipe up "You ride on the Right side of the road Kids!"

Not like a cop is going to stop them...or if the fuckers run into me and ruin my bike will the cop find them Libel..... So it would be best if they Follow the god damn rules.

But with a 10 mph headwind.. my spirit was broken rather fast.... either that or that I ate at the buffet on Friday... had cookies on Saturday... and pizza for Sunday lunch....

Time for more bike friendly food!

Let the Demons Chase!

Well now.... Seems like I let them catch me a little bit.....

But I hear... What you do is Take a bite of a hotdog and ATTACK!!!

Seen this show before!

Same old story... Same old show!

This week has been a thing It all started this weekend with this nasty feeling that... Just one of those nasty feelings you get, It's bullshit but. Thinking that something was going to go bad can certainly Create it. I absolutely don't believe in hocus pocus!... but I do know that sometimes you have to listen to a nagging Voice in your head that says "Watch out" That and most of the things that went wrong this week Were Well out of my Control, and Very Random.

With all of that, and a "Return of The mop"... I had a conversation about how I " Play the Mop ", and it's not like I've been at this Again! For the most I've been hit and miss at "Playing the Mop" since May. In my defence is sort of gives me ... well the blog can be my Training Coach! It reminds me to ride, and sort of gives me someone to answer to.

Of course then there is the Ungodly Terror I raise out there Among the masses... My Nebulous Cypher Enigmatic...... Nonsense!.....

And what is the big question of "The Mop!!!"??? Do we remember?... Do I remember?....

WHO IS 'THE MOP'.....

and in the course of this I also have to ask.....

is it because, again I'm "Playing the Mop!" that i'm asking these questions.

All on a Saturday, When I honestly should be Cranking out some work.

And not Mentally Masturbating Existentialism!

......Something!

What a day... Or "Cause he has Floyd all over his face"

I'll have all of you know... I started this "Social network" racing Coverage... I'm OG... and Ya'll are just following a Previously Blazed Trail...

But What have I done for you Lately....

No Pictures. Sorry, I have a tendency to simplify my life these days, and it was nice to just enjoy the race without trying to get pictures!

I will have T-Bird Know... I started the second round of applause and shout-Outs on the Podium... That was me buddy!

Spent most of the morning Screaming from my chair!!!! T-BIRD!!!!!! and doing the same on Twitter... I also spent all morning obsessing about why people don't put HashTags in their Tweets for the TOU... and why I felt the need to retweet them....I mean how long was it going to take till I was a total Twitter Snob... I mean my learning curve on this crap is Through the roof!

The funny things that happened today. Well I decided not to Activly engage people with my shit eating Grin. Especially since people say it's kind of Creepy... but strangely. I'm just doing my thing, and Suddenly there is Gardie jackson... Or Ryan Barrett or Stephen Flahut Scheffield(I proly misspelled that, sorry dude but I'm not into looking it up).

Like I've said before, the only thing more embarrassing than asking "Are you The Mop?" is saying "Hi! I'm The Mop". But I swear Burke had his eye on me... It was kreepy... or maybe it was the kreepy on me oozing off, and Burke was just trying to keep the Kreepy in sight!

It's funny, I'm not talkative.. but get me going at a bike race! I'll tell you everything. I start talking about Sleevie(mike booth)'s Tatoos I talk about Burke's Dog... BLA BLA BLA BLA. I tell stories about calling Ben J Maynes a Wanker!.

Kind of lame that when Zabrisky hit the line he looked like one of the Thousand Warriors... and I think I have that Jersey BTW... Classic Red!

Ok.. .I stole this from podium insight What a great site BTW...

I told the people around me that to see dave cross the line they had to find the guy in the plane red Jersey and Black Shorts....

So there is this old guy at the line, and he has the rider numbers and as they cross he looks them up. What he needed to do was ask me who it was who was crossing. of course there are about half the Local Riders I can't recognize by a Quick Glimpse. Now Dave passed through After Floyd.. but As Dave passed Nobody noticed, and it was only the normal applause, then I piped up "Go Zabriskie".. Suddenly everyone is like!!! Oh That was Dave, and they all got excited and cheered.

It's been Tough Dave!! Good to see even a Great Champion can be off a little! GO!!! DAVE!!

So... as time went on this old guy was getting more and more frustrated, because he also couldn't look them up fast enough.. nor did he know who he was looking at.

He also gave that standard line about how Spectator unfriendly Bike Racing is. And we all Know that... I mean I was Psyched to catch it by Twitter all morning, it was kind of satisfying.. even though those simple facts seemed to sneak away "What is the Lead time? Chase time? Peloton time?" and "who is in the Lead?Chase?Peloton?"... but I digress.

So.. What really frustrated him was when Floyd Rolled by, and I shouted out "GO Floyd" and said "That is Floyd Landis"... Since I didn't have the sheet and the numbers,

He said "How do you know that."

I said. "Well he had That stupid Goatee and his face had Floyd all over it."

he said "What!"

I told him "Well Why don't you run down to the end of the line and say hello, I bet he is a nice guy! "

he gave me an angry look and stomped away.

you know that old people can't process Vitamin B right! The get Super Stressed and have to take Vitamin B shots, but since it's water soluble it doesn't last longer than a few days....

So basically that is why Angry old men stand on their Lawns and shake their Fists at the Traffic

BTW if we don't realize it, this day will go down in Infamy, We will be telling our Grand Kids about the day that Burke Swindlehurst BLEW The Crap out of the Tour Of Utah in a Mad Breakaway at the Gun, and the entire Nort american Peloton Chased him for 4 hours Dragging their lame assees in for nearly an hour, in packs of 2 and 3.....

T-BIRD!!!!!!!!!!!!

What a Week!

I had a nasty feeling this week.... Ugly to shake those ugly feelings... but it was a good warning.

All this Heath care nonsense... it is a great example of what is wrong with us.

Both the insurance and medical industry are these Ridiculous positive Spiraling self serving ... Sky Nets so to speak just trying to go for world domination.

I was going off about what Middle class is, Pardon me if I don't look the numbers up again. but it's roughly 35k-57K This includes health care... and that is Household income.

the insurance cost per house hold is 13K.

This means that the amount of money people bring in, that are "Middle Class" is 22k-44K. It works out on the low end... One breadwinner making $10 per hour, or 2 Breadwinners making $10 per hour. Or One person making $22.00 per hour... of course including benefits/health care.

Interesting that that is middle class, $400 per week or $1600 per month.

hmmm that $15K dream isn't all that little now is it... I will bet there are some Non Middle class people that make less.

So... my bad feeling... I had a call from someone trying to "Feel Me out" trying to see if my most hated Client had any chance of becoming a Client again. It's crazy, I've had them try and feel me out a couple times in the past 5 years since I dumped them.

What is it about a "most hated" either person or Client... that they keep trying to come back for a taste... It's like "Well I took advantage of you once... sucker... I'm sure I can do it again."

sort of like a child abuser can smell out a victim...

I Really hate that client..... and it has set me off for days ...

In the land of spoons, Suprise... Everybody is a spoon

Damn! I love to have White Hot Bike racing in town. I also am about ready to Tear up because I'm doubting I'll be able to check it all out. Which is an Absolute Heart Break!!

I was thinking about what I should do for the ol' TOFU.

Those who have followed me, know I sort of mess with that Razors edge between Avoiding making things about me, and my own natural Narcissism.

Not to get off on Politics, But for the most part people have their heads up their ass on Healthcare/insurance. And its because for the most part you don't realize how expensive it is; because your employer pays it. Then because you have never made a serious claim, you don't realize how much your insurance company has no intention to pay. Its a Heads they win Tails you lose. And when you realize that incomes haven't gone up in 10 years but cost of insurance has. So you did get a Raise... you got to keep your health Insurance.

But it's all good as long as you keep what you have Right? Cause Change is Scary! And We would hate to see the insurance companies profits hurt. It's not possible that we could cut all these middlemen out and Reduce costs, and cover everybody! Hell no.... Let us just stick with buying the product that INSURANCE COMPANIES HAVE NO INTENTION OF PAYING.. they don't make money by paying claims!.

But I digress....

I think for the most part I'm going to Keep Quiet for TOFU, There seems to be too much of a willingness in our age of social media, to make things more about the authors, and not the subject.

But good luck to everybody; Burke Louder Todd DZ Dave Mike Chase nate alex jesse Cameron Ben... Etc... sorry if you are an etc....

and not to badmouth the social media guys... cause keep it comming cause I'll be stuck at the workstation for most the stages.

SO...

had a nice ride yesterday.. which I don't mean, this road construction is out of control. They don't realize it's not easy to go around construction and add 3 or 4 miles to a bike ride. This Machine that tears up the road and puts about 400 places for either a pinch flat or just to shake the shit out of you and your bike...

Then when they re-Tar them.. and throw all the gravel over the road and suddenly you are Rim Deep in lose gravel, on a road with no shoulder and has 2 thin lanes...

Yep it's something. I dropped off some Gifts to the T-Bird. Told him to tell Tiff that the Yard looks nice. Also you can split Ground cover and then if you try and keep Zero Scape watered it will fill in. Also Most Zero Scape needs to be watered for the first year so the roots can go deep enough to really Thrive.

Then if the Thyme grows you cut them in half and spread them out, so then you can keep going till it's all filled in... but you want them to thrive... so they could use some water....

or Give it time.. Thyme LOL... crack myself up.

For the most part... I'd guess we need to let our local guys get into their Full Zen Racing Form, not give them too many distractions. Be sure not to let our Manic ooze over to them.... unless they are on the Road.

it's not the energy you spend, it's the energy you save....

or some such bullshit.

Reward

I like there to be a new reward of some musing... or something.... My mind for a large part is a disaster... Fatigue... Stress... Like someone pulling on my Heart or Colon...

had a disaster ride... I'm strong.. but I swear I need to.... I just don't feel like I'm one with my bike...

I keep thinking I need to tear it apart and put it back together... Spend 6 hours getting the pedals in the perfect position....

bla bla bla

sorry about the bad reward... so with the bike, so with my writing..

Empty blog space

I just know this is going to be a lame post. There is this point on twitter where you put in 3 "Tweets"WTF... with this Twitter.....

but you put together three posts and realize that you would be better on the blogger.

4 flats today on a 3 hour ride... Pushed it to about 4.5. Had to patch Twice.... I didn't even want to ride today... just figured I needed to get something in... and there it went...

With all the rain I couldn't even sit on grass to change them, ended up on the curb.

And one of them, I came rolling down hill at 30-40 and hit some shit on the road and tire go boom...Couldn't even remember which break was my rear since the front had gone so soft, so quickly......

Good lord...

I'm not even sure I tried with this post......