I'm a Weiner!

Ya, We knew that.

The Great T-Bird!! Has been doing contests, I've avoided them since... What if I win?. And I like a good contest, especially on the computer. Y'all are just fooling yourself, thinking you can win.

So, he announces the time, I was hoping for some kind of riddle, like the Riddle of the Sphinx:

Any time someone talks about a riddle, be ready to say "Man". It's the original Answer to the original Riddle.

No Dice! He asked what his original road bike was. I said, well he twittered it, and I clicked on his name to get all his tweets, then as It was coming up, I remembered that it was from Christmas Day.

Dec 25th, and sure enough A burgundy Peugeot Ventoux.

That is one nice bike especially for 23 years ago.

Stephen Roche won Le Tour

Which is the year after LaMond couldn't defend because of the shooting accident

What did you Get me day!

Here it is... just a few hours left of the APEX of this Vial time of the year. The second of the Three worst holidays on the calender. Long time readers of this blog Might remember, Let me cover the past Christmas Exploits.

Let us just start with some facts:

I have a few nieces, one nephew

a brother sister and both parents.

There are more, but I some of my immediate family just don't count.

I did learn something this year, Our society says that you only get gifts for Immediate family, everyone else gets cards.

• First annoying Christmas. My Sister in Law, because i'm good with wood, Thought I should build her a 500 CD Rack. That would only take a good Week of my free time. But what does it mater to her, Right? My answer to this was that All Christmas lists needed to be submitted by E-Mail(she didn't have e-mail) I want to point out that. Every Christmas I generally didn't give gifts Just my brother and his wife, I picked up things for each of them, and all of my brothers STEP KIDS!... but that and a CD Rack.
• One year, I purchased my sister parts for a new computer. The deal was, that she spent a day with me, Putting it together. My sister Unemployed, couldn't manage to find a job. Had Limited skills. So... She complains "I don't want to do that", I said "Ok, I'll just take it all back." *pout Moan* Can't you do it for me. We put it together and I took her through it step by step. Except for some reason she didn't have her modem drivers. I explained how to install them and sent her on her way. 2 days later she calls me in a Hissy fit... "THIS DOESN'T WORK"!!! I told her to bring it to me and I'd fix it. "NO! YOU COME HERE!" Do you see what drives me up the wall. There are tons of these people! They think it's a negotiation. Some how I owe it to her now! I told her she was going to come here or I wasn't going to do it. I again mentioned that I was happy to take it back.
• Then there was the year that, I'm at the parents home, and we want to have that nice sit around and talk time. On Christmas Eve. My niece pulls a fit, Basically she wanted to just grab her presents and run off. I told her that the next year we would put the presents on the street and they could just pick them up as they passed.
• Then there was the Christmas my brother got me the newest book of Sean Hanity Lies. It was second edition, so the things that he had Lied about, had retractions after the chapters. Basically it was Chapter-Retraction which effectively nullified the whole book.
• My sisters husband, who's birthday is Christmas EVE, Because he was forgotten every year. I got him Golf Clubs, one year.
• after all of this About October a few years back, my sister came over with my niece and they both decided to just be a couple awful Bitches. At that point I turned to my sister and my niece, and said "No more Christmas", and it's been over ever since.
• With my family, I don't even try and play nice anymore. I never bite my tongue, always tell them when they say something stupid, use a word out of context, spurious logic. I live to Correct them, about anything. They can't stand to be around me. Once or Twice a year, they Try and either make up or see if they can stand to be around me, and it doesn't work.
• This year every time one of them said Christmas to me, I said "Christmas is for Kids, and People with Kids"

After 2 or 3 years of No Christmas, It's official... Finally the Grinch Got no Christmas Gifts. Why? as it was Clear to me, after going through this bullshit, being single and still spending $200-$500 per year on Christmas over 35 years of my life.

IT'S ALL ABOUT THE PRESENTS. ALL THE REST IS BULLSHIT!

Christmas to me, is a Very Quiet day, I get and extra Weekend day to read and watch movies. BTW, I managed to not watch a Single Christmas movie, The closest I came to Christmas was going shopping in department stores Twice in the past month, Any time anything Christmas like came on TV in the past month, the channel was changed.

and if I'm Lucky nobody stops by.

My favorite uncle, who's kids hated him, and when they turned 18 he didn't get to spend time with them. He and I used to go skiing on Christmas, that wasn't a bad way to spend Christmas.

I had an old boss, who had one daughter and an Ex-Wife. He used to buy himself a bottle of scotch big enough that he would get up... start drinking and not remember the 25th at all.

Now lets talk about New years.... There was the Knife Fight, the time when my Ex used to work the day before, the Day of New years Eve and the day After.

To me these have always been, just days off... that nothing is open.

Trying to make these days anything else is just a mistake waiting to happen.

War is Over(if you want it)

I saw this: Tell me that it doesn't put this Christmas bullshit in perspective.

Meditate on how true it is now,

as it was in 1969

When John and Yoko started their Peace Project.

WAR IS OVER!(if you want it.)

Give the video a minute to really get going

Seems like Yoko posted this video Jan 1 2007, and this was her note:

http://imaginepeace.com/new... December 8, 2007 I miss you, John. 27 years later, I still wish I could turn back the clock to the Summer of 1980. I remember everything - sharing our morning coffee...

40 years since this campaign in 1969!

Health Care

Here is another rant. This is why Health care is important. These are some of the issues that most people are ignorant of.

Let me establish some Facts.

Average health care costs are $12,000 per Family.

• The cost to an individual, paying out of pocket, for Health care is Between $500-$1000 a MONTH.

1. For $500 you get Basic Health care, The kind of health care you get when you work somewhere Miserable, and the company you work for just wants to say they have Coverage.
2. For $250 a month you can get coverage with about $2000 deductible.
3. For $1000 You get comprehensive coverage, and a minor plan deductible, Congress would call it a Cadillac plan, or the kind of plan Members of the Federal Government get, or People who work for GE, or work for a Union

• In the next 7 years the cost of Health care is expected to Double.$24,000
• The middle 33% of the population make GROSS 29,000-66,000 Per household. That is $15,000-$33,000 per person.
• If you Net out Health care, that is $17,000-$54,000 Per Household IS THE MIDDLE CLASS that is a 300% difference from lower to upper middle class. And think about living on $17,000 per year($8500 per individual) or $1,400 per month or $324 per week, that is enough money to pay bills and own a car YIPEE you are middle Class! Now I'd suggest you are broke.

Now a Story:

About 10 years ago, I wanted to expand my business. once I looked into if I had a chance of clearing another $30,000 to Hire someone else, there was then the other $10,000 to get them health care.

That is 25% of their wage in Health care, which looks to double in the next 10 years. For the past 10 years the reason Wages haven't risen is because Health care HAS DOUBLED. In 10 years there is a chance that half of your compensation will be in health care.

THIS IS UNSUSTAINABLE. Most of the economic growth in this country over the past 10 years has been small business, Most of whom just hired workers and didn't provide health care. HEALTH CARE IS THE NUMBER ONE REASON BUSINESS CAN'T EXPAND.

PEOPLE ASK? Why is HEALTH CARE IMPORTANT?

It's holding our economy back, businesses will not be able to keep going on like this, health care an insurance will implode over the next 20 years. But congress doesn't care about small business, what they care about are SPENDING MONEY ON WAR! and Making sure that the SENATOR FROM HARTFORD INSURANCE(Lieberman), and from Blue Cross Blue Shield(Orin hatch). Are taken care of, and that Exxon Is taken Care of. BUT SMALL BUSINESS get FUCKED. It's almost like there is an effort to make sure that my small company, can't compete with the larger ones. In the next 10 years, the only companies able to afford insurance will be companies Like GE and Exxon and fuck you if you work for any company that isn't an international conglomerate, or State or Fed Gov. and you get sick... Bankrupt is what you will be.

Everybody Deserves a little Chive!

Well

I was going to give up for the day, but things are starting to get exciting.

As I was contemplating what to do with my day, I thought; I should ride my bike. I looked outside and realized that wasn't going to happen...

and the thought hit me....

MAYBE it is time to break out the rollers!

What a horror show, a towel under the bike, one on the bike. Me in shorts and a base layer for sweat. Movie in the DVD....

and an hour of "hippo on a tightrope"

JESUS!!! and I'm considering it... Maybe I should just go eat some pie!

There it was...

There it was, for a brief moment I was inspired. My Muse had me Firmly in it's grips as I day dreamed in front of the T.V., this morning.

And then it Slipped Away.

Befuddled... let me look that up. Yep

Befuddled, this posed deteriorates into this:

My diet is crazy right now. I seem to be living on oranges and Coffee with EggNog as a Creamer. I'd best take a Multivitamin. But I've been feeling Very good... so don't knock it till you try it.Ok, I get some Soup in there somewhere.

This Book has been torturing me for Months, I'm having Brief glimpses of brilliance, followed by periods of "my life interfering with consistent Meditative Focused Thought, to the point where I want to do that little thing where you place your index finger across and between your lips and make a sound similar to the one Twiggy made on the 1980's buck Rogers. bdbabudabuda...

Truth is before I get into anything but the roughest of drafts, I have got to learn how to write.

I just want to confess, I spent a lot of time sleeping in English Class. Sentence structure on the Written page, makes me confused. I've become a huge fan of just using random Punctuation!!

There is a book somewhere right? and Idiots guide to writing? or Fundamentals of punctuation? Honestly if someone Literate could point me in a direction. I would very much appreciate it.

Well, that is it for"Today in the life of my Colon and other such Ramblings".

Music

I say this all the time:

Most the blogs I post to, I only interface through the blogger dashboard. I can go months without going to the Actual page.

when I do:

Suddenly I'm all "DAMN!!! SOMEBODY HAS GREAT TASTE IN MUSIC!!"

Useless facts

... I found this site.

301 Useless facts, but interesting. I do wonder; Why I find them interesting.

• 6. Your stomach produces a new layer of mucus every two weeks so that it doesn’t digest itself.
• 10. The dot over the letter “i” is called a tittle.
• 12. Benjamin Franklin was the fifth in a series of the youngest son of the youngest son.
• 14. A female ferret will die if it goes into heat and cannot find a mate.
• 21. Each king in a deck of playing cards represents a great king from history: Spades = David ; Clubs = Alexander the Great ; Hearts = Charlemagne ; Diamonds = Caesar
• 22. 40% of McDonald’s profits come from the sales of Happy Meals.
• 29. On average, 12 newborns will be given to the wrong parents every day
• 34. Playing cards were issued to British pilots in WWII. If captured, they could be soaked in water and unfolded to reveal a map for escape
• 43. If you sneeze too hard, you can fracture a rib. If you try to suppress a sneeze, you can rupture a blood vessel in your head or neck and die. If you keep your eyes open by force, they can pop out. (DON’T TRY IT, DUMBASS)
• 53. Coconuts kill about 150 people each year. That’s more than sharks.
• 54. Half of all bank robberies take place on a Friday.
• 57. The first bomb the Allies dropped on Berlin in WWII killed the only elephant in the Berlin Zoo.
• 61. Bruce Lee was so fast that they had to slow the film down so you could see his moves.
• 65. The mask used by Michael Myers in the original “Halloween” was actually a Captain Kirk mask painted white, due to low budget.
• 67. The phrase “rule of thumb” is derived from an old English law, which stated that you couldn’t beat your wife with anything wider than your thumb.
• 73. The first product Motorola started to develop was a record player for automobiles. At that time, the most known player on the market was Victrola, which Motorola got their name from.
• 80. 28% of Africa is classified as wilderness. In North America, its 38%.
• 81. Charlie Chaplin once won third prize in a Charlie Chaplin look-alike contest.
• 90. The Guinness Book of Records holds the record for being the book most often stolen from Public Libraries.
• 91. Thirty-five percent of the people who use personal ads for dating are already married.
• 104. People photocopying their buttocks are the cause of 23% of all photocopier faults worldwide.
• 110. Everyday, more money is printed for Monopoly sets than for the U.S. Treasury.
• 117. Wearing headphones for just an hour will increase the bacteria in your ear by 700 times.
• 131. Two-thirds of the world’s eggplant is grown in New Jersey.
• 132. For every memorial statue with a person on a horse, if the horse has both front legs in the air, the person died in battle; if the horse has one front leg in the air, the person died of battle wounds; if all four of the horse’s legs are on the ground, the person died of natural causes.
• 138. Almonds are members of the peach family.
• 147. “101 Dalmatians” and “Peter Pan” are the only Disney animations in which both of a character’s parents are present and don’t die during the movie.
• 149. Hedenophobic means fear of pleasure.
• 187. Donkeys kill more people than plane crashes.
• 220. Al Capone’s business card said he was a used furniture dealer.
• 254. People say “bless you” when you sneeze because your heart stops for a millisecond.
• 259. The bestselling books of all time are The Bible (6billion+), Quotations from the Works of Mao Tse-tung (900million+), and The Lord of the Rings (100million+)
• 266. Johnny Appleseed planted apples so that people could use apple cider to make alcohol
• 291. Stephen Hawking was born exactly 300 years after Galileo died.
• of course the most charming fact would be that the list of facts is probably more urban legend

No rest for the Wicked

Was it only one week ago that Tiger woods drove his car into a tree and it started a week of Gavel to gavel coverage.

On Fridays, I'm completely exhausted.... in a way you would have no idea. I could catch a nap at about 3pm, but then I'd wake up at like 9pm and then climb the walls till about 9am then fall back asleep. Or I try and drag it out, problem is I tend to just be too exhausted to sleep, either that or it's that last cup of coffee. I fall asleep then wake up at the Great and Productive hour of 3am on saturday morning!!!!

Seriously, I'd fucking Kill to sleep in Until 7 or 8 am.

I of course have decided that all my Tiger news will come from Apple news Daily from Taiwan, who do computer reenactment and have funny sentence structure.

Seems like Tiger is learning a sort of MC hammer lesson, about how there is a point you become a lottery ticket for everyone around him. The Extra Funny part is that aparentley Tiger had a deam about Rachel and her having a 3 some with Derik Jeter and David Boreanez.... Doesn't that seem like a Fantisy she would have, and not him...

I guess it's possible that the Dream was that she had sex with them Separately, but in the mind of the Chinese, these Hollywood types are crazy. It's hard to argue!

Here is the Newest!

TIger Woods

I'm about ready to turn the news off. I mean Forever, or at least until this Tiger Woods obsession is over... I don't mean to hope for war or something, but is the news this fucking slow.

I just don't feel like I need an update every hour about where tiger's dick has been.

The real problem is I spend my day reading and watching news. So update 7 on tiger after hour 7 of my news day... is a little much..

ok that is all I can stand to blog.

Somebody said "well you aren't a golf fan"... I'm a cycling fan, and I REALLY don't give a shit who Lance or floyd are fucking... Hell I barely care what poisons they are ingesting, to make themselves better.

1 down 2 to go

Well, the first holiday is tomorrow. Yipeee...

eh... I had a whole whine I was going to work up.. I think I'd rather lay down and take a shower or something..

Ramblings

Ugh.... I feel like hell. Maybe I've got something again....

I've whined about it before, but Fridays aren't my day.... and after struggling fitfully for 24 hours... I still feel like crap.

I could use a good cry... that sounds pathetic... and probably is.

Well, I think I'll try and drink a gallon of water and see if it makes me feel better...

hoping the problem is all the cookies and soda I've been drinking... ya... I know, and even I can't explain it.....

The Ruturn of the Legend

Looks like The Bird has returned to blogging. I felt as though I should Mark the Occasion. ... I'm hoping the powers that be will provide me with something interesting to write...

those are the kinds of things I type to try and inspire some .... thinking.

as much as I've tried... sorry, my friend... the curser just blinks at me ..... Taunting!

But I'll try as long as you try!!!

all about me right!!!

Nightmare

Sometimes, one wakes up in the middle of the night from a nightmare. Your heart is beating, mind running a million miles per hour. For the past half hour you have been running from Vampires or Zombies... Evil Step Sister... A thousand naked woman throwing little pickles at you(The horror here is that this is a joke from a movie I was making fun of somebody for quoting, and it's 25 years old, and ... they are trying to reclaim their lost youth).

You wake up, Heart and mind going a thousand miles per hour... Only that is how I wake up. 3am on a saturday, and no I wasn't being chased by zombies... I just woke up. I have nothing to do... but laundry...

all I really want is to get about 4 more hours of sleep... and to wake up refreshed.

Probably isn't going to happen.. but I'll probably lay back in bed and wish for some real sleep.

This was a letter.....

I have the pork thing, the one you had such a clever name for.... PorkFlu, Porkchop Fever! I can't remember. It has my head in a Vice, sort of a confused haze. I need to rest up and get over it as quickly as possible, but Rest just gives me too much time to reflect, and wallow in misery. I can almost smell it. Does the Swine flu have a smell?

I'm watching 'To Gillian on her 37th birthday.' It seems ok, but all I can think of is that I was 20 something when it came out, and has Michelle Pfeiffer in it, and apparently she is 37, looking good but reminds me of how old I am.... "Am I that old" "Am I old enough to be a professor and live on a beach, to have had a wonderful wife die, and have a 16 year old daughter." And yet here I sit, wallowing in what it is to be me. Anyways, who can live up to these Hollywood fantasies?

Struggling with fantasies I guess. This is going to sound strange, but I just want to exist. Just want to ... be there and be a person, have a life like everyone else. But it seems like that is the fantasy, that I am what I am, Where I am. It's best probably to just let it all be.

Just keep fighting and let it all be, I guess.

White hot Mop acton.

Beat... I'm beaten like an old mule...

Not complaining I do it to myself. I did sneak out and watch a movie. you know I can't just drive and see a movie. I have to walk 3 miles, with the mp3 player get some exercise, then I can eat some wings, and see a movie.....

That is a big Saturday night for me... ends about 7pm.

I intend to make enchiladas and chili reanos tomorrow. No idea how to do the chili things.. stuff peppers with cheese I guess..

Shit!!! I'm sorry blog.... I tried!

(seriously if you want to know why I don't write much.... this is it... this is how it comes out, and I just want to suck my thumb and watch news about Jon and Kate.. Ok I'm kidding, but not... It's more that I'd love to do something so mindless, but my mind won't let me. But in all honesty, i'm 100% up to date with jon and kate and baloonboy drama!)

Ugh... of a week

Too much is going on...

and there is something else going on out there, that I'm too .... You know... Keep fighting buddy... Keep fighting..

Tough to keep going on about my bullshit...

I actually wrote a story, which I can't share, it's ok. I'm going to try and write more. and I'm toying with submitting them for publication.

My writing has become so broken. I need to start writing in story format.

Keep going everyone, try and keep the good Energy going.

Hi Blog!

When there is nothing else, there is the old blog.....

Yep made it all the way to that phrase, The old words just don't run out of the tips of my fingers like they used to..... I wish it could be so.... just for the Cleansing of it... or whatever that word is Catharsis!!!!!

I was feeling a little backed up, went after a fiber cereal, and fortunately some company has mixed sugar with fiber and now it's good for me... Right...

Seriously, i'm running at like an 11 on a 1-10 emotional scale...

Seems like the hate mongers and the fear merchants are doing their best to get the country all worked up.....

always seems easy to me, try and watch who is filled with the most Lies and Hate... and stay away from them....

not that they then shouldn't be hated...

I'm just saying; if you think that Obama is Hitler, and there is some mass conspiracy by ACORN for Kenyan Black panthers to overthrow the U.S. government, and put the white folk in FEMA deathcamps.

You either need to spend a weekend coming to your senses, or get some help...

but for sure the fear merchants are out there trying to use it to get what they want...

this is the nonsense that has me on an 11 on the old emotional volume meter.

ok... I may be joining the Freepers!

But the rocket scientists in congress have now decided to pull off... what I expected.

The solution to health care, is to give more money to insurance companies.

most probably outcome is forcing people into "Insurance Programs" that are low end, So that Minor injuries will be covered but anything Major will still cause bankruptcy. Unless of course people want to spend half their income on a Decent program.

we will see if it's a "Tax Break" or a "Tax Credit" and how much but I doubt it will be larger than 5K.. what is that $400 a month.

apparently the breaks come if you are paying over 15% for health care.

which should be easy since lower middle class is 30K per family, and median health expenses are 15K.

so there could be up to a 4K dollar penalty to not have insurance....